Chapter 11

A little while later, it was lunch time. I sat in my office, waiting for Sayaka to come in. On my desk was the bento third year Sayaka had made for me this morning.

Second year Sayaka, the Sayaka native to this universe, came in.

"Sorry for intruding."

"Please sit down."

"Okay~"

She sat down on the empty chair next to mine, the same chair she sat in when asking me if I had a girlfriend or not.

"Why were you late?" I asked.

"Eh? Didn't I already tell you? My alarm clock app didn't work, and I just kept sleeping. Ehehe~"

She scratched the back of her head in embarrassment.

The way she talked felt slightly different from the third year Sayaka. The air around her was a little different — a little less settled down and more energetic. Like a high school student.

"Okay."

"Is that all? I see that bento on your desk. Did you have lunch yet, sensei? Do you want to eat together?"

I ignored her question.

"Why didn't you come to school for over a week?"

"Why... Even if you ask me that..."

Sayaka smiled vaguely, and her gaze shifted.

I decided to press further.

"I need you to explain to me why you were gone for over a week."

I was hoping to find out why she suddenly appeared again through this line of questioning. I also wanted to know what her state of existence was while she vanished from this universe.

"Hmm... How should I answer this..." She folded her arms and furrowed her brows. "I guess I was gone for a week, but it's fine, isn't it?"

I felt the same chill again. Her answer was eerily similar to the people suffering from cosmic dissonance said every time I asked them about Sayaka.

"Where were you for a week?"

"Where was I? Hmm..." She tilted her head slightly and seemed to contemplate her answer. She closed her eyes.

She stayed like that for a whole minute, then she opened her eyes. Her expression had changed. It no longer was the expression of a second year high school student.

"Sato-sensei, it's not good to ask so many questions, you know?"

I said nothing.

"There are many things in heaven and on earth that remain a mystery, so can't you just let this go?"

Her voice and face were still the same, but this didn't feel like Sayaka anymore. These words, her diction, the way she spoke... It was as if she had become a different person.

"You are Yamamoto Sayaka, correct?"

"Does it matter?"

I gulped.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

"Seiji-sensei, do you want to eat lunch together?" It was Hina-sensei's voice.

"You seem quite popular," Sayaka commented. "But it is better if you don't eat lunch with her today."

She waved her hand.

“Never mind, there is something I have to do," Hina-sensei said from behind the closed door.

I heard the sounds of Hina-sensei walking away.

"Who are you?" I asked.

Sayaka shrugged. "I am second year Yamamoto Sayaka."

"Are you the real Sayaka?"

She smiled slightly. "Who knows?"

I was confident that this wasn't the original second year Sayaka. Something felt off about her from the moment she entered the classroom this morning.

Second year Sayaka reached into her blazer pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper.

"I want you to take this." She handed the paper to me. It said, ’To Third Year Sayaka.'

A cold hand reached deep into my stomach.

"That's all," she said and got up.

"W-Wait!"

"See you later, Sato-sensei~"

She opened the door, stepped out and closed it.

I rushed after her, and opened the door. I looked left and right. There was no one there.

I felt the folded piece of paper in my pocket; it was like a hot piece of amber in my pocket. I wanted to read it, but my hands didn’t move. My hands were shaking.

Fear.

Every fibre of my body was frightened.

What do I do now? This was second year Sayaka. It was naive of me to think that undoing the cosmic dissonance of two people wouldn’t have any effect.

Just before lunch ended, I managed to catch Hina-sensei in the corridor. The students were already in their classrooms, so it was just us two.

“Eh? You have an urgent question? Are you finally going to ask me out for a drink?”

“We still have work tomorrow; and anyway, that isn’t what I wanted to ask you.”

Hina-sensei pouted. “Fine.”

“Say, Hina-sensei…”

“Yes?”

“You’ve taught class 2-1 today, right?”

“Mh-hmm!”

“I forgot to take attendance today. Can you tell me if there was anything missing from class 2-1?”

“Eh~ Even Seiji-sensei has days like these where you forget things.”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“It’s nothing, it’s just like you look like the kind of senpai who always does his work well and is super serious — that kind of thing.”

“We started working here at the same time. You don’t have to call me senpai.”

“You’re not my senpai, it just kind of feels like you are.”

“Anyway, about class 2-1. Was there anyone missing?”

“I think everyone was there…hmm, yeah, I think everyone was here.”

“What about Yamamoto Sayaka?”

Hina-sensei tilted her head slightly. “Hmm, is there something wrong with Sayaka?”

A chill travelled up my spine. Hina-sensei was the only person in the world who knew that Sayaka was currently living with me. Did the appearance of second-year Sayaka reset that memory?

“Remember what I told you about Sayaka?” I said.

“What do you mean?”

No smirk, no glimmer in her eyes. Hina-sensei appeared completely dumbfounded by what I was saying.

“It’s just that Sayaka has been missing attendance lately. Can you tell me if she came to your class today?”

“Hmm…I think so…yes, she was here today. Is there something wrong with Sayaka?”

“No, its’ nothing. Thank you for telling me.”

Hina-sensei gave me an odd look, but didn’t ask any more questions.

I continued teaching after lunch, but I honestly couldn’t remember what I was doing the entire time.

My mind was focused on where class 2-1 was — where second year Sayaka was. Between classes, I caught glimpses of second year Sayaka walking with her friend, Tanaka Ayumi.

Tanaka talked to her normally, as if nothing had ever happened.

Second year Sayaka seemed completely normal, were it not for the fact that a third year Sayaka from a parallel universe was in my apartment.

There were several times when our eyes met, but Sayaka didn’t respond at all. She simply smiled a little, then continued to talk with her friend.

What I really wanted to figure out was if this was the real second year Sayaka; was this the same girl I taught before third-year Sayaka arrived from a parallel universe? Or was this second year Sayaka the unintended result of third year Sayaka messing around too much with cosmic law; an existence that wasn’t the product of natural birth, but generated by the cosmos.

When lessons ended, I went to the office, packed up my things and excused myself. My colleagues were surprised that I was leaving so early because normally we all stayed a little late to prepare for the next day.

Just for today, I needed to go home immediately, I told them. I asked Hina-sensei to make some excused for me, in case someone came looking for me.

“You have to go drinking with me next time,” she said.

“Okay, fine. Next time I’ll treat you.”

Later one of my colleagues told me that unlike her cutesy appearance, Hina-sensei could outdrink any man, and if you gave her an open tab she’d drink you into bankruptcy. She especially had a love for expensive single malt whisky.

I left the office and saw Sayaka and Tanaka changing their shoes at the entrance. They were chatting normally, just like any other day before the appearance of third year Sayaka.

It was as if everything had gone back to normal.

I felt the letter in my pocket. This paper was proof that the second year Sayaka was not the normal Sayaka. But then who was she?

Sayaka and Tanaka left the school, and I followed them as discreetly as I could. The neighborhood streets were filled with students on their way home and some people on their bikes, so it wasn’t difficult to blend in.

I listened to their conversation. Nothing about what she said raised any suspicions. The way she talked, her voice, her expressions — she was just like a regular student.

But I knew that that this wasn’t all there was to her. I recalled her eerie expression when she came to my office during lunch. The all knowing smile, the voice that silenced me.

Eventually Sayaka and Tanaka went their separate ways.

“See you tomorrow!” Tanaka said.

“Bye-bye~”

They waved at each other, then Tanaka turned right and Sayaka turned left.

I would’ve observed this seemingly meaningless exchange with nostalgia under different circumstances. These were the words that all students repeated to each other day after day — until they graduate and even the closest friends go their separate ways in life. Once you become an adult, even such a simple carefree exchange becomes rare.

Of course you say, ‘see you tomorrow,’ to people at the office, but it just isn’t the same. It doesn’t have the same feeling.

Maybe a carefree, unworried and unburdened ‘see you tomorrow’ is a tiny part of youth we all have to leave behind.

I continued to follow second year Sayaka. If anything was going to happen, then it would be now.

Would she suddenly disappear? Would she turn into God? Whatever she was, she would reveal her true identity now.

She continued to walk down the street like there was nothing wrong in this world.

I couldn’t recall her exact home address from memory, but I think this was the most direct route to her house. She wasn’t going somewhere weird, like a construction site, or a shrine, or wherever otherworldly beings go to in anime.

But then I did notice something strange happening.

The closer we got to her house, the slower she walked. This made it difficult for me to follow her (especially since the neighborhood streets were becoming emptier), but she never turned around.

Eventually she arrived at her house. It was a normal two story building that was neither new nor old — the kind you’d see in any neighborhood.

She opened the entrance gate — and then stopped.

“Sensei, I know you’re there.”

I froze in my hiding spot behind a telephone pole.

“You were following me since I left school. If I were to call the police, you’d be arrested, hmm?”

My body felt cold. I didn’t realize it until now, but Sayaka was right; what I was doing for the past half hour was a crime. The fact that she was a student and I was her teacher just made it worse.

“Why are you so curious about me? I’m just second year Sayaka - a wholesome and cute student. Don’t you feel guilty for following another woman when you’ve already got cute and wholesome third year Sayaka waiting for you at home? She probably has cooked dinner, and is eagerly waiting for you to come back.”

My breathing was fast and uneven. The fact that she said those words proved that this second year Sayaka wasn’t the Sayaka I knew before the cosmic laws were distorted.

“Don’t forget to give her the letter, okay?”

She closed the gate behind her, opened the door and stepped into the house.

For a while I just stood there, processing what had just happened.

This wasn’t second year Sayaka, and at the same time it was her. She dressed and spoke and behaved like Sayaka, but when she was talking to me, her personality changed; she would suddenly become aware of the contradictions in this universe.

I walked up to her house and rung the bell.

Nobody answered.

I tried again.

Nothing.

I tried opening the door; it was locked.

Even if second year Sayaka refused to answer, her mother should still be at home. But no one answered.

I left the Sayaka’s house behind and ran home as fast as my legs would take me.

All I knew was that I felt worried.

I sprinted up the stairs, fumbled with my keys and ripped the door open.

"Sayaka!"

The apartment was quiet.

I went in without taking off my shoes.

"Sayaka?!"

"S-Seiji..."

Sayaka was on my bed, wrapped up tightly in a blanket. She peeked out from underneath, like a turtle inspecting if the predator was gone.

I fell to my knees before the bed.

"Thank God you are safe."

Sayaka burst forth from underneath the blanket and wrapped her arms around me. Her momentum pushed me to the ground. She lay on top of me, her shoulders shaking, her tears soaking my shirt.

“Seiji! Seiji!”

I put my arms around her, returning her embrace.

After she had calmed down, Sayaka told me about what happened after I left for work. She did the chores, and then on the way to the supermarket, she passed by her parent’s house, and saw second year Sayaka come out. She followed second year Sayaka, and then just as she was about the enter the school, second year Sayaka turned to her and waved.

I picked up the story from there. I told Sayaka about how second year Sayaka entered the classroom, and no one except Tanaka Ayumi seemed to notice her. Then I told her about how I followed second year Sayaka home, and how she reminded me to give her other self the letter in my pocket.

I pulled the folded note out.

“Second year Sayaka gave me this note. It is addressed to you.”

I handed the paper over to third year Sayaka.

She took it, her hands shaking.

She unfolded it and read it.

I watched her face closely. Her expression changed from fear to hesitation to a resigned smile. When she finished, she folded the letter, and held it in her hands.

“What does it say?” I asked.

She looked at me, then at the floor with a pensive gaze. Then she said, “Let’s have dinner first.”

I wanted to know now, but there was a sense of finality in her words. She had made her decision, and I had no choice but to abide by it.

I sat down at the table, and she put a bowl of rice, side dishes and curry in front of me.

“Sorry, but this is instant curry,” she said with an embarrassed smile. “After what happened this morning, I didn’t have the time to cook something better.”

“No, no — it’s okay,” I said. “Thank you for preparing this meal.”

“Gezz, why are you talking like that. It’s making me feel embarrassed!”

Her face flushed red, and she tried to hide her expression.

When I was living alone, I would eat instant curry once or twice a week. It was cheap, convenient and filling. It tasted neither good nor bad. It was the kind of meal that one ate while watching TV because it the taste was lonely.

Somehow this instant curry prepared by Sayaka tasted better.

After dinner, we washed the dishes together. Sayaka washed the dishes while I dried them. Just like any other day, I offered to wash the dishes, but she rejected me by saying that I was so hopeless at housework that she'd have to rewash all the I cleaned.

"Just watch me do it, and then maybe you will be able to do it too."

She crackled with laughter, but somehow it sounded forced, like she was trying to laugh.

What she said bothered me. She usually would just tell me to rely on her more. This was the first time she told me to watch and learn.

I watched her wash the dishes, her slender fingers holding a sponge in one hand, and a plate in another. Her movements felt slower today, as though she were trying to draw the work out.

There was a shadow on her usually cheerful expression.

Without thinking, I moved behind her and hugged her.

"S-Seiji? What are you d-doing?"

Her face was red, so was mine.

"You just seemed really down, and I thought you needed a hug."

I thought of the time when she gave me a hug when I felt down.

I also recalled the times when I was still living alone and there was no one at home when I had a bad day, when my heart was breaking, and all I could do was cry by myself.

Living with Sayaka made me realize how important it was to have someone to share your life with. Watching the cherry blossoms, walking around a mall, eating instant curry — the most mundane things suddenly became a little special.

"Ehh, what has gotten into you?" she said. "Did you finally fall for me?”

I didn't answer that question.

"If you keep hugging me like that the soap will get all over my clothes."

"S-Sorry."

I let go of her.