Royal Family Feud

The person whom Luna identified as her sister noticed us the moment we started heading down the hill. She had this smug tilt of her head, hands on her hips, and a smile that said "my teeth are perfect, just like the rest of me."

Where Luna had a very conservative style of dress, her sister wasn't afraid to flaunt her shape and features a bit to get the imagination churning. If eyecandy were my thing, the sight would have been impressive. Thankfully I wasn't that shallow.

"Well well…" she said as pompously as possible, "little sister Luna has found herself a human."

"Mond, why are you here?" Luna gave her sister a courteous bow.

"I was informed by father that a new heir was to be selected soon. And wouldn't you know it, little Luna was the first to find a suiter.”

Just the way she talked made my skin crawl. This was like Charlie on steroids. Never thought I’d meet someone worse than him when it came to being pompous.

If she was here, no doubt she'd want to get in our way of getting to the moon. I had a feeling she was pretty strong with magic.

"Why would my matters be so important to you, dear sister?" Luna asked.

"I couldn't let my Little Luna get married before me! The youngest needs to wait for her turn," She snickered. "But I suppose you're so desperate for affection that you settled for concorting with these human peasants.

Charlie let out a flamboyant gasp, stomping up to her with his pointer finger stretched and ready to get in her face.

"Scald headed mill rat!" Charlie retorted. "How dare you claim I, and these fine few, by association, are beneath your status? Crude woman!"

His defense of our honour provoked a negative response. Mond stomped her own foot and stuck out her tongue in a very childish way.

"Wand using poachers! I can't believe anyone thinks humans that speak like this are worth anything. How dare someone of royal blood marry such filth?!"

She turned around with arms crossed and gazed upon the statue.

"Humans are just a means to an end. They have no worth otherwise."

"Then perhaps you'd be willing to challenge us and prove that claim?" Luna grind,  trying to appear confident. “If you believe you are so superior, why don’t we race to see who can complete the statues challenge first?”

"Fine! I'll prove to you that humans are worthless without us!"

Wow. Now I see why Luna was so good at tricking Charlie into a battle with me. She had a lot of experience with pompous people.

But now we had yet another challenge ahead of us. And who exactly was Mond teaming up with? She needed a human companion to even qualify for this challenge, right…?

“HE HE HE!”

Wait, that voice…the person she was teaming up with…it was…

“That’s the bandit!” Luna called out, pointing at the vagabond skydiving down to us.

"Ayo down there!" His parachute glided him down, covering him up as he plastered over the ground. "Sorry, Lovey♡ I was just getting a little excessice!"

"You freak!" Mond shouted. "Where have you been? You were supposed to stop them before!"

"Oh dear, have I upset you?"

"Aaahh!?" Charlie’s mouth fell open. "Master?!"

"Charlie!"

Master? Was this guy the Portal Master? No wonder we had such a hard time catching him in the arena.

But hey, I still got a hit on him. Nothing to be ashamed of there.

"I knew it!" Luna exclaimed.

"If you knew that, then why didn't you say something?" Zumi asked her.

"I was too afraid of being wrong," she said in a really shy voice.

I probably should have suspected that too, but Charlie’s master had gone missing a long time ago. Who would have thought the universe was small enough for this encounter?

"I should have known my greatest pupil would have been the only one able to reach this place! Besides me, of course," the Portal Master said. He was every bit as weird as I expected.

"Uhg…" Mond groaned. "The only reason I picked this old pervert is because he could open portals."

He probably wasn't much of a looker under all those coverings. I wonder what his face looked like under that?

"Master, why are you siding with her?" Charlie asked.

"Because she promised to give me a kiss if I helped her stop you all♡"

"What a creep!" Zumi shouted.

"Tell me about it…" Mond agreed.

"What? How could I ignore a smooch from an delectable space princess?" The Portal Master said.

I was so done with this conversation. I whistled to get everyone's attention back on the real subject.

"Portal Master," I started, "you do realize that if we can't get to the moon in time, our world will lose magic, right? Then everyone's screwed."

"Heh, yeah. I know. But listen bud…" he put a hand on my shoulder. "A man has urges he can't deny. And I got bit by the love bug. This is a dream come true♡"

"He's always been like this." Charlie lamented. "He only ever wanted to learn portal magic so he could date exotic women from other dimensions."

"How distasteful." Luna commented.

"Besides, they promised they wouldn't take away my magic, as long as I helped."

I can't believe this man was putting his own naughty desires ahead of protecting the world of magic! How selfish. Not to mention they probably wouldn't follow through on any of the promises they made to him.

Now I couldn't wait to put them in their place. What exactly was this challenge, and why were rocks slowly changing into the shapes of seesaws?