“Release Me”

“Hey, Fuyumi.”

At first, she doesn’t even react. Just sits there, vacant and still. But, my arrival in the early twilight sees her expression turn from angst to hopefulness.

“Tyler! Hi! How are you? Have you been…”

A hope that I have to end.

“…paid already? It’s a bit early in the week…”

An innocent I have to hurt.

“…isn’t it? Wait, are we finally going out for…”

This isn’t right!

“…coffee? You could have messaged, we could have…”

She doesn’t deserve this!

“…made plans for the weekend or something instead! Haha!”

I hate this, but I have to do it… for everyone’s sake.

“Well, I… err… spotted a vending machine on the way here and saw all the coffees they had in there - sure were a lot of options - so I bought one of each. Wasn’t sure what you’d like, so take your pick!”

I sit down on the edge of the bench, opening my bag to reveal about a dozen cans, all different brands and varieties.

Fuyumi blinking blankly.

There’s not even buffering behind her dark eyes.

I pull out one of the black coffees and crack it open. Desperately needing a sip to be able to keep speaking. If I stop, I won’t be able to start again.

“Look, so, the thing is… I’m really not good at this…”

A long exhale.

More coffee.

Her face shifting into one of uncertainty, but the glimmer of hope remains.

Please don’t look at me like that!

“…I messed up. When I suggested coffee, I meant like this…”

I pick out a sweet latte and place it in the small cupped hands resting in her lap. She blinks down at it then back up at me, still unsure, still expectant.

I’m such a piece of shi-

“…it’s kinda like a turn of phrase in English, just a saying, y’know? There’s a reference in the Shrimpson’s about repaying someone with a soda, and it’s the same thing with coffee. I’m pretty sure I’ve heard people say ‘I owe you a jo’…”

She doesn’t seem to click with the reference.

Please don’t make me explain this.

“…it’s just meant as a token, something small to show your appreciation. Nothing more. Nothing deep. Just a custom, like…”

Oh no, no, no… I can’t bare this…

Her mask is turning to dust. I can see it as the seconds trudge by, painful understanding creeping into her entire being. I don’t want to still be looking when she’s full of it.

“…like? Umm… when you go to a temple at new years. You say it’s for good luck, but it’s not religious or anything. You don’t necessarily believe in the gods or spirits behind it all. You go out of tradition. Owing someone a soda, buying them a coffee, it’s the same as donating a coin, clapping your hands, or ringing the bell. It’s just customary…”

Where the hell am I going with this?!.

“…I guess omiyage would be the closest thing, maybe? Though, instead of a souvenir from going somewhere, it’s a thank you for a favour you can’t pay back, but still want to show respect for…”

This is torture.

I’m all wrapped up in how uncomfortable I’m feeling, but look at her!

Fuyumi is crushed. I can’t even describe the mix of emotions passing through her features, but her coffee can crinkles in her grip. Maybe I shouldn’t have given her something she could bludgeon me with!

She stands up, still holding the can, collects her things, coffee in hand, straightens her coat… her outfit is actually really cute, like this not quite gothic, but still dark tones, girly ensemble… why am I even noticing this?!.

Kaori’s description comes back, triggered by the almost dark academia look she has going.

An alarm bell goes off in my brain.

Jirei!

I flinch as she finally turns to me.

There are tears threatening to break loose, but she is just about holding herself together.

“I… I guess…”

Is she a… what’s the term, my brother used it while we were watching that show with the girl who loved the MC to the point of obsession, stalking, murder…

Yandere!

Run!

“…I made a mistake.”

Huh?!.

“Well this sucks. Got my hopes up and everything.”

She’s taking this way better than expected. It’s obvious she’s hurt, but not that much? Is she just holding it in?

“Next time you offer a girl something, be clearer about it, OK!”

“Uh, yeah? Sorry…”

Fuyumi lets out a deep breath, then stretches to the golden sky. Making her appear a little taller, not so beaten down by my bullshi-

“Hey, Tyler?”

She pauses for a moment, as if summoning up the courage to confess something more.

“If this is because of Kaori…”

“No, it’s my bad. I just wasn’t accurate with what I was trying to convey…”

Her sad smile almost becomes a smirk for a split second, then settles into resignation. Not a drop of cruelty or vindictiveness within her, more self derisive or mocking of what she wants to say.

“…you should still be careful…”

What?!.

“…she’s a bit of a landmine.”

Bomb dropped, Fuyumi shakes her can of coffee, bows a little in thanks, and pulls the tab. It pops off like a grenade pin.

“Good guess on the latte. In case you ever owe me again.”

She walks away, leaving a crater in her wake.

I’m now the one left in anxious ruin on the bench.

A bag full of cans and a mind full of questions.

My once cold black coffee now reaching lukewarm in my hand. I stare into the middle distance, barely focusing on the roofline of the college building across from me, the beyond only an impression in coppery hues.

Absent-mindedly, I raise the can to my lips. Instead of the bitter smell of coffee, a sweat fragrance teases my senses. A black shadow flutters past my cheek.

Did a crow just land on the bench?!.

I recoil - almost spilling my drink - to find…

“Kaori?!.”

She rifles through my bag, then straightens with the only other black coffee in hand, a premium blend.

“You did well.”

The crack of the ring-pull is loud and distinct. The racking of another weapon.

“You were watching!”

She eyes me while taking a long sip, her expression obscured by the can.

A sigh of relief and disappointment.

“No.”

“Then?”

“I got bored of waiting.”

“Waitin-”

I was on my way to the library. I was meant to meet Kaori an hour ago.

“I came looking for you and saw you two…”

She trails off and has another tentative sip.

“…I sat down over there…”

Turning toward the corner of the courtyard, indicating the general location with a flick of her can.

“…put my headphones on to give you privacy.”

“Oh… sorry…”

I look down at my own coffee and press the sides between my fingers, testing the spring of the metal, stalling…

“…I was on my way when I ran into her, she looked so forlorn, I just had to do something…”

I start to get impassioned, twisted round in my seat.

“…I couldn’t go on a date with her, but I could still buy her a coffee from the vending machine, and explain that this was all my fault…”

Kaori eyes me, coldly.

“…she took it well. Nothing explosive like you suggested. She did say…”

“I said that about her so you would do something.”

Her lip curls and she takes another drink. Purposefully hiding her sneer.

Is this what Fuyumi meant? Does everyone take Kaori’s rough personality to mean she’s dangerous? Isn’t that why she does it, so they’ll leave her alone? Or…

“Funny, she said the same thing about you!”

It’s my turn to hide behind a can.

She stops mid-swallow - not choking or spilling - as if she was paused in real time.

I close my eyes for no more than a long blink. When they open, my vision is obscured, a soft pressure on my cheek. Turning me into the statue.

My Medusa slithers into full view, the bitter coffee scent on her breath, mixing with her own sweetness.

“And what do you think of me?”

Intoxicating!

Kaori searches my marble expression for an answer. My eyes but polished stone.
Satisfied, she smiles, a slight sigh filling my nose with that bittersweet perfume again.

“That was not your reward, by the way…”

Her gaze directing my attention to where I hadn’t even realised my hand had been resting on my cheek.

“…that was just my feelings on the matter.”

“I… uh… reward?!.”

Blinking unintelligibly as though in a drunken stupor.

She smiles sincerely.

“I have something better than that for you.”

Kaori extends her hand, draining the last of her coffee, and sticking out her tongue in disgust at its bitterness.

I stifle a laugh, remembering the first morning I saw her standing in the doorway. Not as Kaoru my friend, but as Kaori…

Whatever happens…

“Let’s go!”