Epilogue - I will uncleanse you

I had planned my outfit. Had this perfect vision of an afternoon in my puffy white dress. But the weather was just unfavorable. Possible drizzle, somewhat windy. It would have to be my denim overalls, white t-shirt and…

‘Let’s see…’ I let my hair loose. ‘Noo! It’s horrible…’

I dug through my drawer, but not for long. Moving made me reorganize all I possessed, and the order was still fresh.

‘There!’ I pulled out my favorite red ribbon scrunchie and tied back the front strands of my hair, looking from left and right. ‘Perfect! Although… What if he prefers more of an elegant look? No way, he will have to put up with my ribbons.’

Meeting him was all I could think about. In an hour, we would walk side by side. I glanced at my phone one last time to check the time.

***

‘I will be 7 min late. Missed the previous train,’ he wrote.

It was a bummer, of course. That was 7 minutes less time with him. But next time I was late, it would be my ‘Out of jail’ card.

The train station was as lively as usual. Everyone had their own business to take care of, rushing places. And here I was — waiting for my date… Our first actual date.

Just thinking about it made me nervous. And the fact I realized I was nervous made my heart thump in a rhythm I wasn’t used to, turning skin clammy. I tugged at my neckline, trying to catch a breeze, yet my eyes couldn’t divert from the main entrance.

He said 7 minutes… It was 5 now. Or was it 6? That could be almost 7 then. I tried to get myself under control, remembering his gaze, his frame, his walking. I wondered what he would wear. He was a t-shirt and jeans kind of guy, that much I knew. But what else…

And there he was. Despite people walking in between, I couldn’t take my eyes off his. I wanted to cement every bit of this moment into my memory. First dates are a one-time occurrence, after all.

‘Hey,’ he said.

Of course, he wore a white t-shirt and black jeans. Classic yet handsome. Oh, so handsome. But how could he be so calm? I couldn’t fall short myself.

‘Hello!’ I wanted to crack a joke. Something, anything.

But I couldn’t stop gazing into his eyes. Could’ve spent a long time doing so, but it probably would’ve looked weird. Surely the passing people had already glared at us plenty.

‘Should we get going?’ I asked, already walking outside.

‘Lead the way,’ he smiled tenderly. ‘You said you planned something?’

‘Not much. Just a few places I could take you to. Hope you don’t mind walking.’

I did plan some things. He probably already forgot the time he took me around the game that late night. He was pretty drunk, after all. But now, it was payback time. ‘First, we’re going through a park overlooking the bay.’

Although we said nothing, it didn’t feel silent. In between us were countless of glances and snickering each time our eyes locked.

‘How’s your new job?’ he broke the ‘silence’.

‘Oh! It’s okay. Honestly, it’s a world I’m not familiar with. They are all smart people. So much smarter than me. I feel ridiculous to be among them. Sometimes I think they made a mistake, or that I fooled them somehow for accepting me. But anyway, I’m quite happy to be there. Sorry for not chatting as much since I started,’ I answered. ‘But more importantly, how are you? It’s been a big move, huh?’

He scratched his arm, thinking back on something. ‘Don’t worry about the chatting. I understand, although I was a bit lonely.’ He fixated on a cafe as we passed by. ‘It’s been hard since the move. Especially the first days. Did I tell you my bed delivery got muddled up? I slept on the ground for a week. But that’s nothing compared to work.’

‘Oh! Tell me all about it. I can’t wait to know more. Don’t spare the details.’

‘I didn’t know what to expect when I started, but honestly, people were so kind. I spent the whole first day talking, eating lunch, and getting introduced to the project.’

‘That’s academia for you. It was similar for me, really. Although my supervisor is quite a workaholic. We got straight into dissections. Fifteen mice! Can you believe it? All in one day,’ and there I went into my bubble. ‘Sorry, continue!’

He laughed, giving me a nod. ‘Please don’t stop talking. It’s lovely to hear you get lost in the conversations.’

He was totally teasing me, wasn’t he? ‘Right. I’m yet to see you get lost in our conversations.’

‘I’m always lost in them and I want more.’ He was such a sweet-talker. I wasn’t sure if he just knew my buttons or if he was naturally like this. Either way, it was a win for me.

When we reached the highest point of the park, we stopped to overlook the bay. Surrounded by the burning trees, a hearty autumn breeze, we gazed at the water ahead, a couple of boats sailing in the distance. As I saw him engrossed in the view, I took my chances and walked behind his back, getting into a position.

‘Emily?’ He turned to me. ‘W-what are you doing?’

I was in the starting position of the cleansing animation. Upon getting his full attention, I brought my arms forward and spun around. He just stood in a stupor and I couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

‘What was that?!’ he looked around in embarrassment.

‘I.. Uh, uncleansed you.’ I knew I had a stupid smile on my face.

‘Uncleansed me? What do you mean?’ he tilted his head.

‘You don’t remember? Well, I hope by the end of the day you will,’ I tilted my head back at him. ‘We have to continue. To botanical gardens!’

As we caught up on the details about our new jobs and living in the new city, I kept getting swept away, forgetting to listen.

‘What?’ he asked upon noticing me spacing out.

‘Sorry… It’s just I’m so proud of you.’

‘You are?’

‘Mhm, you’ve come so far since we met.’ Words fell short to express it, really. To see him grow like this, all of his own volition… It was so special.

Upon reaching the botanical gardens, we immediately noticed a hedge and exchanged a glance. Although it was nothing like the one from the park, it sure brought back memories.

I skipped to the other side and put my hand through. Branches dug into my skin and I tried my best to not think about the crawlies hiding inside. But my thoughts were quickly halted as soon as I heard his laugh. Closing my eyes, I let it sink into the corners of my mind.

‘Hand,’ I said with demand.

‘You’ll get us in trouble. I’m pretty sure we’re not supposed to touch the plants here,’ he said.

‘Hand! We won’t if we do it quick.’

He took it, gentle as a warm summer breeze. I squeezed it back, caressing his skin, stroking his fingers, getting a good feel for them. I always wanted to do it. Of course, back then, it wasn't the right time.

‘Shall we go inside the greenhouse?’ I retracted my arm and came around to see him. It was so simple and natural.

The daylight made the inside pleasantly warm, filling our lungs with the green scent. At the back, there was a white spiral staircase leading to a platform at the top, which overlooked the verdant magic below.

‘Wait here,’ I said and rushed up, commencing my next uncleanse.

‘This again?’ he grinned. ‘Bravo!’

Hands on rail, I gazed down at him. ‘Still don’t remember?’

‘You’re messing with me, aren’t you?’

After that, we continued our way to the next location. It wasn’t much, really — merely an entrance to an amusement park. Besides, it was already closed for the season and the eerily empty colorful entrance arc made us stop and wander.

‘How are your singing classes going?’

‘It’s pretty good. I like my teacher. She’s pretty tough, but every time I learn a lot and it really does feel like I’m getting better. Getting somewhere.’

He took a picture of a jeering face of a clown right above the arc. ‘And how’s your next cover?’

‘In preparation. I bought a camera and a better mic. Now I at least have a budget I can use.’

‘If you need any help, just ask.’

I was baffled how he could put up with an idiot like me. Yet, it made me happy. Which reminded me — it was time for another uncleanse. I looked him straight in the eyes, turning into my pirouette and sending over my invisible wish for him to be happy.

‘Do you want to come here next spring?’ he asked, still staring back at me.

I nodded with enthusiasm. ‘You bet. Can’t wait to hear you scream.’

‘Are you sure you wouldn't be the first?’

‘No way!’

‘You’re afraid of thunder.’

‘That’s different. Besides, screaming in an amusement park is one of the fun parts…’

‘So you would be the first one to scream. Gotcha.’

I squinted — my attempt of wordlessly telling this debate was not over, but we had to move on.

‘Where to next, oh the healer of my soul?’

‘Food. I need to replenish my mana.’

We stopped at one of my favorite places at the harbor. They served the most delicious pita sandwiches, as they never held back on the filling. With takeaway in our hands, we sat down on the bridge, legs dangling down.

‘Watch out for seagulls. It’s feeding grounds for them here,’ I warned while hovering my hand over the sandwich, eyes darting around.

With haste and gusto, we devoured our food like it was our last dinner. But we did a critical error — we locked our eyes with mouths full of food. That only meant an unrelenting laugh attack as we both struggled to swallow.

‘Want to see Kyu? We bought this crazy toy right before I moved out and he went completely nuts about it,’ he said after we finished, taking his phone out.

A wave of curiosity washed over me. What phone did he have? What was on the wallpaper? What kind of pictures did he take? I leaned in closer to see it all.

‘Here. Rolling like crazy. He gets these moments sometimes and you just have to play with him,’ he chuckled at the video.

‘He means a lot to you. You must miss him…’

At that point, he probably realized just how close I was and, glancing back at me, he blushed. Oh… So shy. It made me just a little more enticed to push it further, but I held back. I had a mission to focus on. Reeling in his silent gaze, I stood up.

‘Remember.. Please…’ I thought as I twirled around. But he just clapped.

‘It’s getting late,’ he said, somewhat sadly. ‘Do you need to head home soon?’

I nodded, looking down.

‘Let me take you back then.’

‘Not yet. The beach is close to my place. Want to head there?’

I let him go slightly ahead, watching his hand and sensing an urge to take it, yet only a salty breeze cradled his fingers. Weak waves washed the shore as the sunset light played in them.

‘To think that we’re here now,’ he said.

‘Quite something, isn’t it? Although I do miss our days in the game. Those guys. Wonder what they are up to.’

A weather-beaten bench was to our right. I tapped the seat, inviting him over as I plopped down myself. Yet he kept a slight distance.

‘Don’t you still talk to Deilo?’

‘Oh, yeah. I don’t want to gossip, but have you heard the latest between him and Sana?’

‘What do you..? Oh. Really?’

I nodded, withholding my grin. But it was time to finish my payback.

Getting up with anxiety that my plan was a bust, one last time I uncleansed him. ‘Now you will love again… You’re free from the spell.’ His eyes widened upon my whisper. ‘Do you remember now?’

His palms buried his face, followed by a slight nod. ‘A little… It was you.’ Wiping the hair off his forehead, he looked up at me. ‘Although the spell broke a while ago.’

Here, that awkward smile, the words that escaped it, swept me away, leaving me breathless. So unfair… But I wasn’t about to give up. I closed the distance between us by putting my knee on the bench between his legs, leaning in closer.

‘Oh? Are you blushing? Words got stuck in your throat? Want me to help you with getting them out?’ I whispered, lowering my voice just enough.

He was awfully bashful, frozen even. Just when I thought I got him, he gripped my waist and drew himself in for a kiss. Except my hair got in the way. Oh, the betrayal… I pulled back a bit, locking my gaze with his. And we laughed. Couldn’t stop, really. Just like that one time at the park.