Inspector Prokrutka and the old ninja

Iori pouted as she sat in a robe with her hair wrapped up in a towel. "Why'd you call Lame-tani over instead of Oki-kun?"

"Why would I call a boy over when you and Carol-chan were stark naked under all that dough?" Mimoko glared.

"THAT WAS THE POINT!"

"Iori, you really do push the envelope when it comes to offending Mimoko-sana," Utami glared.

"Wasn't asking you. Now go call Oki-kun! I'm in a bad mood!"

"I'm in a bad mood too. Damn clown busted a hole in my new roof!" Harold fumed as he gazed up at the damaged roof.

"Ugh, guess that means I'll have to set up everything in another room. But thanks for calling your friend over, Mimo," Carol sighed.

"My apologies, but I don't think I ever got your name," Utami stated.

"Oh, it's Carol Cooke."

"Cooke-san-"

"Er, I prefer being called by my first name. Cece's fine too."

"Cece?"

"Yeah, it's her username. I only call her "Cece-chan when we're on stream, but off-stream it's always "Carol-chan"," Iori stated.

"I guess Carol-san it is. My opinion of you isn't as bad as my opinion of Iori, but it will be if you cause more trouble for Mimoko-sama."

Carol nervously laughed before beginning to move everything out of the room. Iori, Mimoko, and Utami helped too, and in no time flat, the room was clear.

"Ya know, maybe we could put a clear window there so this could become a stargazing room," Carol suggested.

"We'll see what the repairs say. But dammit we better not be having to pay in full for that clown's antics. He broke in and entered in the first place, so he pays the damn fine!"

A knock at the door brought a halt to the conversation. Everyone cautiously headed for the door and looked out the peephole. Outside was a man with a thick mustache clad in a tan trench coat and Herbert Johnson trilby.

Utami elected to open the door with Iori and the others on standby.

"Hello, I am Inspector Vladislav Prokrutka from the WWCF. I came because I heard there was report of cheating here."

Iori immediately began to show signs of displeasure as she recognized the man. Turns out Inspector Prokrutka was infamous both for cracking down on cheaters and accusing everyone of cheating. At the chess club's first tournament at Lagoon pathways, Iori had encountered Prokrutka who was suspicious of how she achieved a perfect 5-0 result despite only being rated 500 at the time. While Iori hadn't cheated and was just naturally gifted, Prokrutka didn't buy it and began constantly hounding her and examining her games, all to try and prove she was cheating.

But Iori wasn't the only target of his ires. Okisato was too, and had an ongoing feud with him. Mimoko had never met him, though she was aware of his infamy thanks to her mother.

"Hello, I'm Mimoko Inoue. I believe you came due to my request. A few minutes ago, a cheater by the name of Jester barged in here and challenged me to a chess match. However, he cheated 4 times and even reset the game after I mated him. Luckily, his device broke and I was able to beat him proper."

Prokruta scowled and began jotting down on his tablet. "And do you have game log of game?"

Mimoko nodded and pulled out her WWCF card, however, the data from her match with Jester was corrupted, making the game unable to be properly assessed. However, it was Prokrutka's reaction that really startled Mimoko. Since Mimoko could not provide proof, SHE was the one Prokrutka suspected of cheating.

"Well that's just bullshit," Iori glared.

"It is not, in fact I think her overall record is worth examining. Her rise is too unnatural. I suspect there could be foul play," Prokrutka glared.

"I play all my matches fairly," Mimoko glared.

"There are ways to cheat over board and with WWCF card."

"In that case, just watch my stream. We didn't stop recording until after we were freed from the dough, so the whole game should be there," Iori glared.

"Are you trying to cover up?"

"Really wanna do another Cringe-athalon huh."

Prokrutka scowled at the remark and pulled up the stream on his tablet. Much to his annoyance, the full game was present on stream, and Jester was clearly the one cheating.

"He skirt cheating ban again, and Mimoko appears to be clean, for this match. I shall log in the uncheated game in your match data, but do be warned, I will be subjecting you to the anti-cheating screening procedure."

Mimoko nodded and Prokrutka left without saying another word.

"Vile scum. How dare he accuse you of cheating," Utami glared.

"I hear he accuses EVERYONE of cheating. A shame considering he was apparently a former world champion and trailblazer to the game."

"That guy was a world champion!?" Carol gasped.

Mimoko then explained Prokrutka's chess history, and how in recent months he had suddenly begun accusing top players of cheating. One instance got so heated that the WWCF decided to have said player play Prokrutka in a series of games, with the ultimate winner having their word be just. In what would later be dubbed the "Cringe-athalon", Prokrutka lost in both the over the board portion and on the WWCF card's online play portion, though came close to winning the over the board portion.

No sooner had Mimoko finished explaining that there was another knock at the door. Fearing Prokrutka had returned Iori cracked her knuckles and gazed out the peephole, only to find an old man dressed like a ninja standing outside.

"Uh, that clown mentioned he had ninjas right?"

"Yes?"

"Well think one showed up."

"Not in the slightest. Don't compare our proud clan to that buffoon's acolytes," a voice snarled.

Everyone turned to notice the old ninja man that was supposed to be outside, was inside. Iori went on guard, but quickly found herself in a rapid fist-fight as the old man charged at her faster than the speed of light.

"Not bad, seems you have some potential, but still 100 years to early!" the man shouted as he tripped up Iori and wrapped her up like a cocoon.

Iori and Carol trembled in terror as Harold suddenly appeared holding a shotgun.

"Don't move ya crazed varmint!"

"Well that must have been a pain to get through customs, unless of course..."

The old man quickly closed the distance as Harold stood motionless.

"...It's only a replica."

"STOP! If you wanna avenge your master, I'll play you fair in square in a game of chess!" Mimoko shouted.

The old man stopped and shook his head. "Perhaps there's been a misunderstanding. I am Kazujirou Kirikawa, the patriarch of the main branch of the Kirikawa clan."

"Kirikawa, like with the DNA test!?" Carol gasped.

"Correct. In fact, I'll prove it to you now."

Sure enough, Kazujirou had a blood relationship to Carol, Harold, and Iori.

"If you're related, then why'd you attack them!?" Mimoko asked.

"Why wouldn't I? If they're Kirikawas, they should be battle-hardened. You and the red-haired girl are not part of the clan so I would not have attacked you. Now, allow me to deliver the assessment of your performances; you all naturally fail, but I will give praise to the young woman for matching my pace and the young man for daring to try and pull a bluff on me. However, it seems you both lack experience, which is why you failed."

"'Young man'? Were the same age aren't we?" Harold glared.

"No, Kirikawa genes both prevent physical aging and offer extended lifespans. I'm going on 100 even though I look much younger."

"100!? I'm only 70!"

Kazujiro took a good long look at Harold before shaking his head. "You were Minii's son, yes?"

"Pretty sure that was my ma's name. Never really met her since she died a bit after I was born."

"I see. She was the frailest of us three. And were you her only child?"

"That's right."

"A single birth. In our clan, single births are often frowned upon."

"Why's that?"

"Because multiple births are the norm."

"Oh, my daughters are quadruplets."

"The one number of births that is always considered unlucky."

"... Guess you're right," Harold sighed as his mood became a bit more depressed.

"Multiple births are the norm? What about Carol?" Iori asked as she struggled to free herself.

"Oh, I actually got a twin older brother named Zach," Carol replied.

"Wait really?"

"Yeah, but sadly mother has him under her control, along with my grandmother on my father's side."

"Hmm, it sounds like your wind of the family staggered down a different path due to lack of knowledge on your heritage," Kazujiro sighed.

"How exactly are you related to us though?"

"Minii was my younger triplet sister. That means I'm technically your grandfather's uncle and your great uncle, though just call me Jijiji for short."

"A triplet!? Guess you weren't kidding about multiple births."

"Though the real question is this young woman's relationship to the clan," Jijiji stated as he turned to face Iori.

"The thing said my grandpa was some Roichi guy."

Jijiji let out a heavy sigh. "So he didn't die a virgin after all. Damn that deranged nurse. Perhaps that's where you got some of your blood lust from. Fear not, for we shall catch up at the villa."

"The villa? What do you- Gah!?"

Before Iori could protest, Jijiji flung her over his shoulder and scooped up Harold and Carol in his other hand.

"HEY! This ain't good for my health!" Harold protested.

"Don't worry, I'm about to put you on a healthcare plan that will do wonders for you. As for you, I'm afraid we can't involve outsiders in this, but fear not, our clansmen will watch over this place and repair the damage, so you're free to leave if you please."

And with that, the four vanished in an instant, leaving Mimoko and Utami behind. Deciding it was best to head home, the two left, posthaste.