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Jul 13, 2023
I'm a huge fan of the fast pace here, I was smiling the whole time since the jokes were weaved in with the narration so well 😄 Also I loooove that Vega's taller! It's such a cute detail I think it's so cool 💕
I really enjoyed this chapter, but I'm most impressed by how you made me actually invested in a story about soccer players! Really liked the dynamic between Jun and Hiroshi 💕
I love the immediate hook of this MC who has a lot of flaws but doesn't realize it! You do such a lovely job of writing his narration without making him seem unlikable despite those flaws. Loved this opening 💕
Jul 07, 2023
Alicia is such a breath of fresh air!! I really like how she's presented as a force to be reckoned with, always love badass old ladies :D
I love how easily this flows! The last line is such a good stopping point omg,,, on to the next