Jun 24, 2022
The dysfunction of his neuro-chip is pretty original and well thought.
The dystopic universe is quite interesting:) You managed to make me confused at the beginning but finally, I understand everything by reading the next.
Are you planning to participate in the writing short Ln contest?
And the food changing at lunch x') it could have been frogs I would have been so fun.
I think that Isei gained a sort of superpower because now his brain tech is down, he can see through things, maybe he can notice things that the gouvnement is hiding thanks to the neuro-chip illusion. As the robotic arm of Aria.
You write well! I just found that your first chapter was very long. It would be more readable if you split it into 3 parts for example. That's what I do so I recommend you to do the same if you need.
