It’s My First Time Working Late Nights at a Convenience Store, and If I Keep Getting Demon Lords, Kappa and Other Oddballs as Customers, I’m Giving My Two-Weeks’ Notice
As of tonight, I’m running the graveyard shift at my local convenience store.
It’s my first day on the job, so I call the greeting out nice and strong. It’s kind of comforting, actually, at 2 AM.
Since we’re short-staffed, it’s just me and my manager on duty. Except that after giving me a run-down of the basics, he told me to call him if I needed him and went off to go have a nap in the break room.
I’m Haru Muramatsu. I’m 21 years old, and I work the register part-time at my local Mawson’s.
Huh, so people really do come here at this hour. I’m guessing it’ll be some drunk old guy, or some flabby freeloader here to stock up on chips.
I don’t even get out the “mase.” I’m shocked speechless.
In strolls this hulking, massive figure who’s got to be at least six feet tall.
He’s decked out in a black cape and purple armor, along with a sword (with a seriously sick paint job) strapped to his waist.
To top it all off, he’s even wearing a pair of gnarled, wicked-looking horns that flash silver.
All in all, I’d say he looks like some kind of...
“I’m a demon lord, if you must know.”
Oh my god, he spoke!! And what is with this guy’s voice? It’s super low!
Is this some kind of cosplay? No, wait. Who goes to a convenience store at 2 AM in a full-blown demon costume?
“You there. Lad. I require sustenance. Fetch me something to eat.”
They say the customer is king, but no one ever treats the employees like actual peasants.
“Uh. Um, well...”
“My stomach; it is empty. Hurry and bring me your finest wares.”
Wait, did he just waltz into a convenience store and demand our “finest wares”?
Dude, just go to a family restaurant or something.
“I mean...I really like these, I guess.”
I pull one of the pork cutlet sandwiches from the display.
I’m always eating them for lunch, so I can vouch for how tasty they are. They’re decently filling, too. So, I gingerly pass it to the self-styled “demon lord.”
“And this is?”
C’mon, who doesn’t recognize a pork cutlet sandwich when they see one?! Besides, can’t this guy at least speak normally? This is already annoying enough!
“A pork cutlet sandwich.”
Ugh, I can’t believe that I actually had to explain that! This whole exchange is mortifying!
“I see. Then, I shall partake of it. However, should it not appease my palate, your life shall be forfeit.”
Doesn’t he know I don’t make the sandwiches? Dude, I’m begging you, just let this act drop. Seriously, give it a rest. Pretending to get ready to draw your sword isn’t cool.
The cosplayer turns the sandwich over in his hands, looking at it from every angle in a pretty convincing pantomime of how a demon lord from another world might inspect his first ever pork cutlet sandwich.
And then he brings it up to his mouth.
“Whoa, hold on there!”
“Why must I? I hunger.”
“Yeah, but you haven’t given me any money for it yet.”
“What is this ‘money’? Does it refer to those gold coins of yours?”
Is he trying out some weird new shoplifting thing?!
Where you, I don’t know, dress up as a demon and try to scare some cashier into letting you walk out with free food?!
Dude, how...did you even think this would be a good idea...?
Doesn’t matter. There’s no way he’s going to pull the wool over my eyes.
“Sir, this is a convenience store. Like all stores, we require cash in exchange for our goods and services. I mean, great costume — but there’s no way you’re a real demon lord.”
You know, I’d say I handled this pretty well.
But, this guy...
I look up to see that he’s still there, glaring down his nose at me.
He puts a foot up on the counter, hoisting himself up onto the narrow ledge. The whole thing is pretty intense, and I scramble backwards.
There isn’t too much space behind the counter, though, so I’m stuck staring this demon lord dress-up fanatic dead in the eye as he bellows:
“You doubt my status? How dare you mock me, boy. I’ll make you regret that.”
“I’m so super sorry for all of this!!”
In rushes a dark-skinned young woman dressed in a sexy red and black maid outfit (with ample cleavage, I might add), apologizing all the while.
Her blonde ponytail flutters behind her, which makes for a striking view. So, for an instant, I forget all about the demon lord who’s towering over me.
Except that, on closer inspection, her ears...are pointy. Like, anime-elf-pointy.
Hooo boy. With those ears, and that outfit, she’s definitely another cosplayer!!
“Demon Lord, sir! Just what d’you think you’re doing?!”
“This fool insulted me.”
“Still, y’can’t climb up there! Go on, get down!”
The elf-maid tugs on the demon cosplayer’s cape, and he reluctantly returns to the floor.
Honestly? That was kind of terrifying.
“Sorry, Mr. Man. Our Demon Lord here ain’t been to the human world much, so he’s a little out of touch.”
...Great, she’s in on it too.
Ugh, I’m at the end of my rope.
But isn’t calling the manager for help on my first day a little too pathetic?
“Hold on a minute! What’re you holding?!”
“Sustenance that I received from this lad.”
“Geez! How many times do I have to keep tellin’ you to stop asking strangers for food?! You can’t pay for it, so put it back!”
“I refuse. I wish to sate my hunger.”
“You can’t do that, we’re broke! I’m gonna start earning money at my part-time job soon, but you’re just gonna have to hold out until then! So, let’s go home, ‘kay?”
Yeesh, what is up with this skit...?
I don’t even know what kind of reaction they’re going for. But, looking at this logically...
If they hurry up and get what they came here for, then I’d get to finish my first shift in peace.
“Sorry, but could you hold on for just one second?”
I step away from the register and slip off to the break room. With a quick glance at my manager — who’s still passed out on the couch, snoring softly — I grab my wallet from my locker.
I sprint back to the pair, who are waiting surprisingly patiently.
“I’ll buy you the sandwich, so you can take it to go, okay?”
With that, I hold out my hand to take the pork cutlet sandwich back from the demon lord cosplayer.
The two of them silently exchange a glance.
“Look, I still have to ring it up, so could you please give me the sandwich?”
My voice is a little curt as I flap my still-outstretched hand.
“I’ll pay the three hundred yen for it, so...”
“Boy, are you inferring that you wish to purchase a favor, nay, a boon from this demon lord?”
The return to my laid-back late-night shift would be the reward, yes. Can we move on with this?
“Yeah, that is kinda suspicious.”
“You know what? Fine. I don’t need money or favors or anything. Please just take the sandwich and go.”
I’m done. I give up.
Stone-faced and run ragged, I admit defeat. They can take the thing free of charge, as long as they leave.
I mean, who’d refuse an offer like that?
The two...customers...confer off to the side in low whispers, sneaking obvious peeks at me.
“Sir, ya...don’t suppose that human overheard us talkin’ about how broke we are, d’you?”
“Inconceivable. I would never debase myself by requesting aid from one of his species.”
Guys, I can still hear you!!
“Regardless, I shall accept this lad’s misguided charity, for I am a forgiving soul...who is famished beyond all compare. Let us away, Sheri.”
“You’re gonna what?! Sir? Demon Lord?!”
Sandwich in hand, the oppressively tall cosplayer exits the convenience store in a few quick strides. Huh. I guess he really was hungry.
“Bein’ in debt to a human’s pretty pitiful, but, well...I owe ya one. I’ll return the favor someday, ’kay?”
The elf-maid cosplayer gives me a quick bob of her head in thanks, before racing off to rejoin the demon lord dude.
What a mess.
I go grab another pork cutlet sandwich, ring it up, then drop three hundred of my own yen into the till.
Finally, I put that sandwich back in the display with a long, hard sigh.
“Ugh, my first day on the graveyard shift, and I already just want to go home and cry.”