Past Meets Present

I couldn't tell if I was nervous, calm, or restless. Maybe everything all at once.

The living room TV ahead of me played an anime rerun on low volume. My eyes couldn't seem to focus on anything well, and Asagiri off in the kitchen quietly washed dishes as a miasma of anxiety hung over us both.

But I didn't feel anxious, rather, I let anxiety swim around me, and refused to let it sink in. Even crisp sounds of running water from the kitchen couldn't detract from the rush I felt. If anything, I radiated confidence—and for Asagiri's sake—confident was what I needed to be.

A tingling feeling commenced in my pocket. I slipped out my phone: no new texts or calls. Great, now I'm imagining things. Maybe some of that floating anxiety was finally sinking in.

"Hey, want something to drink?" Asagiri blurted as she rummaged through our fridge. She wore her burgundy jacket along with those cat ears.

"I'm fine." But my dry lips protested. "Actually, can you get me some water?"

"Sure."

I heard a faucet running before my girlfriend walked over, a conflicted expression scribbled across her face.

"You sure you don't want me to head out before Noriko gets here?" She held the glass out for me as I reached up. "This might be your shot at a real girlfriend, you know?"

I chuckled. "Don't worry, that ship's beyond sailed with her."

"Huh? Why?"

"Well, you'll see when she gets here." I took a sip of my water. Answering her question would just complicate things more than they already were.

Asagiri nodded and walked back into the kitchen without another word.

It doesn't matter happens, or what I think. A choice was made seven years ago, and a result manifested. Now I'm only picking up the pieces of what's left of my past.

A few minutes went by. Furbolt off in his cat tower was grooming himself, then his ears perked up, likely sensing the inevitable. Noriko was near.

My phone vibrated—this time for real—and I checked the inbox:

'I'm outside,' she texted me. I read it in her classic, sensual voice; the same voice she'd so often try charming me with. But those days are long gone. I'm just gonna be saying hi to an old friend.

I rose to my feet. Asagiri gave me a reassuring glance as I walked by the kitchen. She really was too good for me, but the person I was about to see was equally as important, at least at one point in my life.

Our long hallway towards the front door hadn’t changed much over time. Mom’s sense of design had always been contemporary, but influenced a tad too much from America where she currently resided. Wonder what she’d think of Noriko visiting again.

I stepped down onto door level and nudged Asagiri's shoes on the floor aside. My nervous, jittery hand brushed itself through my hair one last time before grasping our doorknob. In the short walk from the living room here, I'd already lost my earlier confidence I'd radiated. 

With a quick twist of the knob, I swung the door outwards and allowed bright light to pour inside. Someone's outline gradually materialized.

A silver-haired woman wearing jeans and a blue, checkered flannel glanced towards me. She was almost as tall as me, but her lavender, lavish eyes displayed apathy, as if they were lost in their own little world.

"Hey, Kazuma." Noriko said with a small wave. "Been a while."

It was like I was looking at a long-lost ghost, but I hid my inner emotions. "Only been a few months. Did you miss me already?"

She half-giggled. "Cut the crap, it's hot out here."

"Oh, sorry yeah. Make yourself at home."

She walked by me and took off her shoes. I couldn't help but compare her to old Noriko: Gone was her once long, flowing hair now cut down to just past shoulder length. Her body was alluring as ever, though the familiar, wondrous glimmers that once thrived in her eyes had since dissipated—replaced with empty visages of someone that was but wasn't Noriko.

Time waits for no one.

She looked down then dug into her handbag. "Wait, before I forget something else, here."

"Hmm?"

Noriko tossed a keychain towards me, barely giving me a chance to react and catch it. The keychain in my hand featured a chibi version of Sanae Tsubasa, a purple-haired character from Dominion's Paradise clad in her regal Cleric outfit.

"Woah! You actually nabbed one at the last comic market?" I stared with gleaming eyes at her trinket.

"Yeah well, when you're a shut-in you have spare time for stuff."

Huge crowds suck for me so I can't ever go . . . "How much do you want for it? Probably worth a pretty penny on the aftermarket."

"Nah, just keep it." Her lips craned into a small but vibrant smile. "You’re a bigger fan anyway.”

Marry me, I wanted to joke. But it probably wasn't smart around her. “You sure though? Not hard giving at least what you paid for it.”

“It’s fine. You know I’ve kinda moved past geek stuff anyway.”

"You're positive then?"

"Yes, yes." With a curious look, she ventured further inside the hallway.

"Sweet, thanks bunches!" I chased right after her. Money is tight thanks to moochers anyhow.

Noriko peeked around the familiar home she'd been in several times before. I'd done my best to maintain things while my family was gone, but since Asagiri arrived, things had been smoother sailing. An extra helping hand had gone a long way.

As we arrived into our living room, Asagiri made eye contact with Noriko from the kitchen. My past and present had finally been brought together.

"Oh? Hello," Noriko said, confused. "Kazuma didn't mention anything about living with a girl now."

Asagiri walked over and bowed her head. "Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Asagiri, and—"

"She's my government-issued girlfriend," I bluntly said. Both women were staring at me with befuddled expressions. "Sorry for the surprise, haha . . ."

Noriko was speechless for a second, then her face displayed bewildered amazement—the most I'd seen from her in years. Her lips curled up before she burst into wild laughter.

"Hahaha! No way! I knew you were desperate, but not that desperate! Hahaha!"

"H-Hey! You're embarrassing me!" I felt my face blushing pink.

"Sorry, sorry." She seemingly wiped a tear from her eye. "It's nice to meet you too. I'm Mito, but just call me Noriko, like Kazuma here does."

My girlfriend looked flustered, as if she didn't know how to respond. Even she hadn't worked up the courage to call me by my first name yet, while Noriko was gung-ho about it right after we first met years ago.

"Ahh, okay. Thanks for looking after Nishikata this entire time." Asagiri seemed fixated on Noriko's left hand. "He hasn't told me much, but I'm sure you're an amazing person."

Did she notice? I thought to myself.

Noriko turned towards me with a flirty grin. "He hasn't tried doing anything weird, right? I know how this guy is."

"Define weird." Asagiri stared in my direction too.

"Yup, sounds about right for him. You have my condolences."

The two women giggled with each other at my expense. Even though Noriko had just arrived, they'd already bonded like sisters. Great, there goes what little good reputation I still had left.

Attracted from the commotion, Furbolt dashed over and nudged himself against Noriko's leg.

"Nyaa! Nyaa!" Furbolt affectionately said as his tail wagged. He was more energetic than ever.

"Oh! Furbolt! I missed you!" She bent over and scooped him into her arms. "You're getting old! I remember when you were just a kitten! Senior kitty soon, huh?"

"Nyaaaaa! Nyaaaa!"

Spoiled cat always liked her more than me! Playboy cat!

"I'll start making something for us all to eat." Asagiri hustled into our kitchen. "You guys can catch up in the living room."

"Thanks, but I think I need some fresh air," Noriko replied. She gave me a quick glance. "Wanna come out to the patio, Kazuma?"

Her request seemed quite sudden. My eyes looked towards Asagiri behind the kitchen counter, seeking her approval, and she showed a supportive smile.

"Alright," I said. "We'll be right back, Keiko." Crap, accidentally called her by her first name!

A cute blush then she was shrinking behind the island counter. Her azure eyes radiated timidity, like I just confessed my feelings to her.

"O-Okay," she replied. "I'll be right here . . ."

Too cute! But I kept my excitement in check. Noriko had already stepped outside onto the patio with Furbolt, and I ran after them.

My hand slid the sliding door closed behind us. Our backyard was small, but it’s surprising we even had one. Greenery stretched for a dozen or so meters ahead while we gazed out from an elevated wooden porch. A shed off in the far corner near mom's garden housed old, family keepsakes that I'd also been charged with maintaining.

"There you go, little guy." Noriko plopped Furbolt down onto the wood floor. He scampered down short stairs to play around in vibrant, freshly-cut grass. 

You're welcome, dang cat.

Even though today was hot, we luckily got blessed with shade at this time of day. Noriko leaned forward on the wooden guardrail as she dug into her handbag again.

"Did I lose another one?" she said with narrowed eyes. 

I shimmied near her and pulled out a lighter from my pocket. "Here. You left yours last time you swung by."

"Shit, I'm always forgetting something." She grabbed the item from my hand then pulled out a cigarette box from her bag. 

"So that's why you wanted to come outside?" I said. Noriko had picked up smoking since we graduated, but I'd hoped she would ease up on it since our last meeting months ago.

She clasped a cigarette between two fingers as she brought it to her lips. A quick spark lit its tip and she exhaled a gray cloud. "Smoke break, yeah. But I wanted to chat too."

"About what?"

Her tired eyes peered in my direction. “Your new girlfriend: Asagiri. She's cute—young too. How long has your GiG program been going?"

"A week as of t-t-today." I coughed a little from the smoke. "I'm not expecting anything serious, but she helps around the house and keeps me company. Can't ask for much more."

Furbolt off in the grassy distance chased after a butterfly. He bounded through colorful flowers in vain pursuit of an unattainable desire.

"Funny how life works," Noriko said. "We were on the verge of doing the stupidest shit possible a few years ago, and now we're here talking like old men."

"Shut up, we're both only 25," I chuckled.

"Time's running out to settle with someone." She gave me a playful wink. "Old geezer Kazuma."

The golden, diamond-studded ring on her finger commanded my attention. Inklings of melancholy still coursed through me. "How's your husband feel about you coming over again anyway?"

"Oh, he doesn't really care. I told him about what happened on the bridge, and he's been chill letting me visit since he trusts you."

I shivered remembering that fateful night. "Wait, did you tell him everything from that day?"

"Well, obviously not what we did after."

Conflicted. "Probably better everyone just forgets, to be honest." I already knew she hadn't mentioned her questionable past involving our suicide pact, not to mention the double-life she once lived—unbeknownst to even me until it was far too late.

She raised her left hand towards me. "This could've been your ring on me, you know?"

"It's whatever. I'm happy you found someone great." My voiced strained not to sound disgruntled. "Your husband is a doctor, right? And still young?"

"Yeah. Gen's cool, but he probably spoils me too much. I just laze around home all day, do some housework, then spread my legs when he's back from work."

Was that really necessary to mention? "Surprised you don't have kids yet."

"We were trying for a while but decided to hit pause on it—not that we stopped having sex though." She shook her cigarette, tumbling bits of ashes into the ashtray I'd laid out earlier.

"C-Cool to know . . ." There was nothing more I could say. I looked ahead towards my black cat playing in our garden. Even though he was more of an indoor feline, Noriko's presence would change him whenever she visited. But the thought was probably just an excuse to let my mind wander when Noriko brought up her sex life. 

 Then, I felt her gaze pounding into my side, as if trying to egg more responses out of me.

"Staaaaaare."

"What?" I stammered. "Do I gotta comment on everything?"

"Well, you don't have to, but you're the one that always wanted VIP access to my fun bits." She exhaled another puff of smoke. "Too late now."

"Didn't I reject you when you tried throwing yourself at me? You probably still want to even now."

"Heh, at least your ego hasn't shrunk as much as your libido," she chuckled. "My husband maxed out on both those stats though."

To be honest, I still didn't know much about the guy. Noriko barely mentioned anything about him except his vapid sex craze. A part of me thought it was almost too comedical to even be true. Or maybe she just knows I get jealous easy . . .

I chose my next reply carefully. "How did you two meet anyway? Never took you for the social type."

Noriko clicked her tongue, as if angry about the topic. "Meh, not worth talking about. More importantly, tell me how things are going with you and Asagiri."

She changed the subject! "G-Going? Like how?"

"Come on, don't tell me you haven't tried putting the moves on her."

"She's . . . hard to pull anything off on, haha."

"Hmm?"

You'd never understand how much of an unremitting, unapologetic mooch she is! Though her mega hotness balances things out. Mmm.

Furbolt strolled back onto the wooden porch, prancing around Noriko to get her attention. She looked below at him and smiled.

"That reminds me," she said. "Asagiri was wearing my old cat ears I left here forever ago. You two that close already?"

"We're just playing pretend. It's nothing serious."

"Pretend, huh?" Noriko gazed up towards a familiar sky. "Weren't we always playing pretend back then too? Pretending that the whole world was against us? Even now, pretend is all we're doing."

"What do you mean?"

Her sincere eyes met mine. "You saved me from myself that night, but I still worry my old dogmas might’ve leeched onto you. So it's nice you found someone worth sharing your life with, even if it's just temporary."

"Temporary is the keyword. Who knows what I'll regress into once she leaves."

"Don't be too sure about that. I get good vibes she's into you."

"Stupid joke," I said with a smile. "I'm just a loser that was too stubborn to chase after the first girl I really cared about."

"You still can." Noriko barely whispered.

"Huh?"

She hurriedly wedged her cigarette into the ashtray and scooped Furbolt up. "Come on, let's head back inside," she told me, "I feel bad leaving Asagiri alone."

"Oh, right. Good idea." What was that all about?

I opened the sliding door for us as aromas of sweet, sizzling meats whipped our nostrils. Asagiri off in front of the stove donned a white apron with a spatula in hand.

"You two done catching up?" she said from afar. "Food's not done so just chill some more."

"Screw that, I'm helping you out!" Noriko freed Furbolt and joined my girlfriend in the kitchen. They started chatting like longtime friends as they prepped our dinner.

Never thought I’d have two girls cooking for me together. The sight was fulfilling, like I was somehow winning at life. Life . . .

Noriko’s ultimatum seven years ago: even if we had committed to it, how would the world have changed? What message would it have sent?

We were both different people back then, now changed by our circumstances. We'd chosen separate paths and finally rejoined at a fork in the road.

But there's always the chance we were still just playing pretend.