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fourpool

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registered at: Jun 11, 2022

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aaa

Sep 10, 2022

Story was fantastic fam, thanks for recommending me to read such a fantastic story!

Our School is Perfectly Ordinary

Chapter:22

Sep 07, 2022

MAN, no school/romance/comedy is really frustrating. If you could fully explore both of those other topics I think this goldmine could've been a diamondmine

Our School is Perfectly Ordinary

Chapter:14

Sep 07, 2022

I know Im sharing my thoughts on the story elsewhere, but I just wanted to write how I feel like this was definitely the best chapter by far. KNEW IT that Hito was his own little protag.

At first I thought the suddenness behind Hito's announcement was rough, but it makes so much sense and after I read it, it felt so darn good that I can't see it being anything else. Srsly good work!

Our School is Perfectly Ordinary

Chapter:10

Sep 05, 2022

I appreciate this contribution to society. Please tell me Super has read this 😩

Supersession69's Crazy Incursion

Chapter:1

Sep 05, 2022

I'll try and not run with what everyone else is saying here (but yeah, prose is so good)

I got two thoughts.
1, Im sure it would be pretty hard to get concrete constructive criticism from honeyfeed's audience. Lets hope that Kodansha gives you plenty when the time comes :P.
2, I feel as though the cover art betrays the work. But in a weird way. I look at other series with more harder hitting, darker toned cover arts and the story just does not live up to those expectations. So looking at this piece of artwork, I oddly set the idea of a darker story to the side. I came in expecting nothing along the lengths of action (completely disregarding the thriller tag).

Fantastic work, thanks for finding a way to convince me to read it asap lmao!

City of Flowers

Chapter:19

Sep 04, 2022

Honestly? Seeing Ana commenting on each of these chapters XD, gives you really high hopes for the work to succeed you know?

City of Flowers

Chapter:8

Sep 03, 2022

To add onto what Ana said months back, really cool to see some actual symbolism take place within characters themselves. Its hard to expect that coming into Honeyfeed's competition's landscape... you know? Or at least, recognizable beyond surface level, but not too deep to where it becomes unrecognizable to even a keen eye. Well done lol

City of Flowers

Chapter:2

Sep 03, 2022

Cant think of anything super smart and critical to make you wanna have sex with me immediately.
DAMN SHAME.

I feel like it's hard to tell the difference between a great writer, a good writer, and a mediocre writer. But at least through this alone, I feel like you can safely say you're above like 75% of the competition (including what I previously had for CP 😭)

City of Flowers

Chapter:0

Aug 31, 2022

Literally Thug C rn 😍

Why is the Trip to the Demon World Never Peaceful?!

Chapter:1

Aug 03, 2022

Actually pretty solid, outside of what Mushiki said a while back I dont see any problems here.

F-I-R-E-G-I-R-L-S

Chapter:1

Jul 30, 2022

Been waiting for this for a while man, glad to see it lived up to the hype! 😎

I Planted a Girlfriend

Chapter:0

Jul 30, 2022

I think the whole concept of him immediately focusing on the girl, instead of the world around him and how the hell he got here is fantastic.

Really highlights the whole idea you wanted with him being a womanizer lmao. Two short chapters in and I feel like I understand where this series is going already, which lends itself well for a casual fun rom-com.

That time I got reincarnated in the middle of a royal wedding..

Chapter:1

Jul 30, 2022

Short sweet and to the point! I have to agree with Otkrlj stated in their message today. Prologues are supposed to highlight the tone of the series first and foremost, and you definitely got that highlighted here (unlike mine, which has a darker chp 0 then suddenly swaps to a comedy, which I need to work on).

On the topic of the big paragraphs, it feels like it'd be hard to break 'em up. So it might require removing some portions. OR, you can break it up with more dialogue bits, like instead of the character thinking things, he thinks out loud!

I can see the panic from the character, as well as the comedy/romance coming in in full force lol. It lends itself well to the story, so props there too!

That time I got reincarnated in the middle of a royal wedding..

Chapter:0

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