Jul 30, 2022
Short sweet and to the point! I have to agree with Otkrlj stated in their message today. Prologues are supposed to highlight the tone of the series first and foremost, and you definitely got that highlighted here (unlike mine, which has a darker chp 0 then suddenly swaps to a comedy, which I need to work on).
On the topic of the big paragraphs, it feels like it'd be hard to break 'em up. So it might require removing some portions. OR, you can break it up with more dialogue bits, like instead of the character thinking things, he thinks out loud!
I can see the panic from the character, as well as the comedy/romance coming in in full force lol. It lends itself well to the story, so props there too!