Jul 30, 2022
I am still making my way through the story.
A revelation has been made, however, from my previous comment. On the subjective side of things, I am not particularly liking the story. I think I'm starting to see the hands with which the pieces are being moved by and it has broken the immersion I was attempting to develop.
Ai is giving me some troubles.
A bit of a fun hypothesis about the human eye and the pattern recognition that lays deep within the most formative parts of our brains: According to the hypothesis, predatory pressure from snakes has selected individuals who are better able to recognize them, improving their survival chances and therefore transferring such skill to their offspring. Humans, compared to almost all other animals, rely heavily on our vision for our early survival and now our modern daily lives rather than the senses of touch, smell and hearing.
I mention this because I see a pattern with Ai. There is something... malicious about her nature that I was concerned about the more she spoke and acted. She is a schizophrenic creature, almost. Something untoward is afoot with her behaviour, though there's been so little evidence at this point to really explain the motives. From chapter to chapter she has gone from apparently timid and weak willed to cool, collected and putting on minor airs to, in this chapter, suddenly a mystic with some sudden revelation about 'the true nature of the world.' The change in character is rather sudden to me, the ease with which she went from stranger to close associate in the matter of moments is making me suspect.
Kiro, on the other hand, seems willing - blissfully eager, in fact - to suddenly accept this at hand when he is on such a defensive with the other students and adults in his life. Perhaps the monstrous vision Ai and Kiro share has left him vulnerable. This to, I wonder, may be a facade. Something is not right with this world, clearly; it makes me feel as if what we are experiencing through their eyes may yet be reviled to be superficial.
I look at the cover art of your story, it it may just be coincidence, but Ai has particular sort of shadow over her her face. A few steps away from becoming a blend with the background, perhaps.
I do, however, have some concern about Krio's explanation of how the eye functions. The observation, say from a camera lens, is that the image becomes flipped once it passes through a convex lens. That is only technically correct, however, with the human eye. It is a bit more complicated than that. The eye does not transmit images as a camera would, only electrical impulses with which the brain interpolates through the optical nerve or, more simply, that is how we perceive vision through the neurological activations in the brain. You can wear inversion glasses, see the world as upside down, but your brain will be able to cope and adapt to that in a rather expedient manner. In the end, your brain doesn't show you 'what' you are seeing, it only interprets what you have seen after many steps and even depending on mood. Right side up or upside down becomes rather moot at that point, if your only frame of reference is what your perception is. Theoretically, you can engineer electrical impulses into the brain to make you experience all manner of sensations: into a manufactured vision, if you will. Though, I am imagining, this is the theme of the story, given the amount of gesturing towards eyes and seeing that have been made.
However, all of this is concerns matters that are subjective to me, aside from the neurological science part. I will continue reading on. I am looking deeper to find any objective details to see if there is any concrete merit to my feelings, though we shall see.
I apologize for the long winded remarks, however, I will take as long as I need to in order to say what needs to be said.
Keep working. Good luck.
