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Nov 05, 2023
To:Steward McOy
Also forgot to respond to this, but thank you 😭it’s changed a lot from the original draft.
Nov 03, 2023
To:Wina Ru
thank you!
To:Kitsune
well, maybe tomorrow
Well, I went with this one for the holiday theme, and it certainly does not feel cheery 🤣 I really enjoy the concept of reliving the night together over and over. In a Christmas setting maybe that wouldn't be so bad. The description of the tree too as like a dead thing I also really enjoyed. I guess all that's left to say now is...Merry Christmas?
Ohhh, I would not want to be a judge for this contest. Flat out would not, could not lol. This was awesome, I love what you did with the supernatural aspects and the tug-of-war and battle between the two. I also like an addition of another character. this really felt like a "sequel" to the events in the song and the short story. Great job!
To:F.C Fondness
Thanks! It was really fun to write second-person for once!
I also used second person, which I hope is a great minds think alike and all that moment 😭. You used it to great effect, and your prose is lovely. I wonder what you'd think of my novel Telling the Bees, because it's got some similarities in concept. All in all, it wouldn't hurt to lose to you again in this one 🤣
To:ItWasntMe
Thanks!
Oh, interesting! I liked the "being a marionette" because of the words of others, that was really cool. Awesome job!
Thank you! It definitely needed it.
I figured it would be a good moment for him to adopt it 😆
Nov 01, 2023
I don’t think I’ve ever felt bathroom envy before now 😭also wanted to comment that I think you’ve done a really good job of getting into his mindset and kind of vibe by writing this in first person. Not an easy skill, by any means.
Oct 31, 2023
People need to hear that they’re beautiful. People also need to hear that they’re more than beautiful. I think Umi’s circumstances really highlight that. Also, I really enjoyed how they felt an honest connection with each other, even if it wasn’t romantic. Leaves room for that special someone to come!
You’re doing amazing Yuuma, don’t give up!
Such a sweetie. dating isn’t easy, I feel his pain