IceDonut / Comments

IceDonut

25 | him/his | European

Writing since 2016 to find the fine line between the bittersweet beauty of sorrow and the feeling of deep human connection, creating worlds that provide shelter from reality, but also embrace its way of being.
I occasionally write comments/critiques that could be short stories on their own, so sorry for all the flooded comment sections 😅
Read into my current novel "Celluloid", if you are interested!

registered at: Sep 08, 2021

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Aug 17, 2023

To:Koyomi

Did you just ... rickroll me ... or did I rickroll you and you rickrolled me back? Did anyone get rickrolled there? 😅😂
Because Tokyo has the best universities in Japan 😶‍🌫️

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:16

Aug 17, 2023

To:Katsuhito

They still do have several months ahead of them! They can enjoy the time they do have left together 😉
And this is the way it is with many hobbies and interests in your childhood: Eventually, life will come in the way and challenge things. After school ... or let's say after her studies, since universities tend to offer EA as well, she probably would have also dropped volleyball this way or another ... The way that life plays, and even though it would be great, but one does not stay young forever and priorities get shifted 😊
Yes, the legacy from Takurou's dad definitely lives on in his sons, there 🙂
In the good times and in bad times! Standing side by side! 😉

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:16

Aug 17, 2023

To:Deleted User

Yes, this could be a tough time for them. But let's see how they are going to approach this ... 😶‍🌫️

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:16

Aug 16, 2023

To:ChronoSigma

I think second accidental date would be a good term, even though they won’t be there all alone this time … 🤔

Ashiya‘s family even has a butler. So you might have a point to your theory there 🤔😉

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:7

Aug 16, 2023

Yes, this is more of an interlude to reflect on all the impressions! And exactly, Takurou is certainly not very upfront and proactive kind of guy. He likes to observe from afar, before taking action 🙂

P. S. Truth be told: I had actually opened a new browser tab to read your story as soon as I get around to. So while I had been almost entirely writing the last days, I definitely have it on my list! 😁

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:6

Aug 16, 2023

To:ChronoSigma

Let’s be honest here: Things didn’t go fully as I planned them 😅
I had a few scenes planned that were more balanced, but had to condense them down to finish everything in time (I’m rather slow with writing 😅), things were cut and got more one-sided in the first half (more like 2/3) of the story. The priority was the progression of the romance there …
This chapter here was definitely meant to have a very strong focus on Ashiya, since her character is not the simplest one to wrap your head around, but after the next, things were originally supposed to develop more evenly than they actually did, turning most secondary characters into mere exposition devices for the protagonists … which is better than having no people surrounding them, but developed characters is usually a better way to approach.
I think I’m often a little bit too ambitious with what I’m actually capable to pull off in the extremely limited amount of time 😅
But Kudos to you for already catching up on the precursors of that! I really hope to now shift the focus for the second half of the story back to where it was supposed to be.

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:5

Aug 16, 2023

To:ChronoSigma

Haha, exactly! That's the cover image, already hinted at in the last chapter! 😉

I see you already take a liking to Ashiya 😶‍🌫️
But don't be so harsh towards Kukai 😜 She's more than just a distraction tactic, but yeah, a secondary character definitely 😉

And don't think too much about the titles. This one here is just the name for the artwork for example 😉👍

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:4

Aug 16, 2023

To:ChronoSigma

In the next chapter we really do ... at least in a metaphorical sense. It's contemporary fiction without any real fantastical elements (as the contest rules require it) 🙂

And yes, I see why it got a little bit confusing right there. The confirmation of this is more on the subtext: Yes, Ashiya is the one who created the artworks and she created them alone.
Kukai only took the credit in order to not expose Ashiya as the original creator. For certain reasons she seems to not want anyone to know that she spends her time with photography. I hope all this gets a little bit more clear through the next chapters 😅

Oh, wow ... things got dark really quick there 😅
But as I said: Contemporary Fiction without any real fantastical elements. But maybe I should make the statements in this chapter a bit more precise to not raise such misconceptions.
Thanks for your thoughts on how you experienced this story! That really helps a lot to identify issues! 😊

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:3

Aug 16, 2023

To:ChronoSigma

I hope in a good way 😂

Yeah, but they have the wisdom, so they have to share it! Even though their value system might be out of sync pretty much 😅

And you're right there. Now we'll encounter someone who sets everything in motion 😶‍🌫️

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:2

Aug 16, 2023

Ohhh! So that was why the mysterious Void Champion (?) girl appeared to Jun right at the Festival. She probably was like: "What you still doing here? Car-kun/Truck-kun should have long taken care about you!" 😂
But I think the fact that she did not instantly do anything about it, also might be a testament that they are not entirely heartless and reorganize the flow of time ... maybe even planned for this, as Claire said it could not be a coincidence that Mia from all worlds existed in Farelle at that time 🤔
But being honest, we currently don't know anything about the girl with papers in her hair or the other Void Champions. I guess we have to wait for what is going to happen AND how Jun is now trying to get back to Claire. I mean there are not many things a simple human being like him could do now 😅 But I'm still thrilled so see what you will cook up for us 😶‍🌫️

With a Love Sorceress I'll Make My Romance Last!

Chapter:35

Aug 16, 2023

To:minatika

Did I mention that I'm working as a web developer already? 🤔😅
I still wonder how the magic behind this is going to work and how it determines/alters the user's fate 🤔
I know what you mean. More unsafe writing territory = more experimentation = more time. I feel that 😅 But I think you did great!
Oh, I didn't know many novels you read are read trades? Then, good luck catching up on them! But you can take your time with the others, I guess. Isn't running away 😉

With a Love Sorceress I'll Make My Romance Last!

Chapter:34

Aug 15, 2023

Heh! So Kirara actually talked Ichika into attending (probably even into dressing up as much)!
And Kirara is mixing up the whole competition. But she seems to have some mad skills at table tennis there! 🫣
And it's kinda funny ... Ichika dressed up so much, Chihiro is even trying to hit on her 😅 I think we went too far there! 😱
Let's see how she's going to handle this (and how protective Haruhi will be of her 😅🫣)

Love, Manga & Blackmail: A Secret Otaku's Countdown To Romance!

Chapter:32

Aug 15, 2023

To:Deleted User

Haha, force him to love you! 😂
I wouldn't say she's not proactive, but I guess most guys probably have an issue with her attitude - especially if they have just been rejected by the pure-hearted Rakuko 😅

Ohh! Now I see ... yeah, this sentence wasn't mean in this way 😅 Maybe it's better to edit that one out 😶‍🌫️ Thanks for the heads up!

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:15

Aug 15, 2023

To:ChronoSigma

Hey there! Yes, the first handful of chapters are definitely more slice-of-life-ish without a clear goal in mind. But a bit further down the line we will receive a more clearly defined objective! 🙂
Definitely thanks for the feedback! 😊

Celluloid: The Magic beneath us

Chapter:1

Aug 15, 2023

To:Katsuhito

Okay, so at least I was right about Ichika! That's great! 😊
But what you imply with what you wrote about Sumi ... sounds really much like things will get dirty 🫣😕 I'll have to see if I really like that 😅

And yes, I heard about the concept of Nagoshi No Harae some time ago somewhere (but forgot the word again - so it was only a google search away to remember again 😅). I think it's fine to get a little creative with Shintou traditions. After all it's not a rigid religion, but has many local variants and "dialects". I'm still curious why you opted for this special way of the ritual, though ... I mean like if there was a reason to deviate from the usual path or if it was just because it felt better 🤔

Love, Manga & Blackmail: A Secret Otaku's Countdown To Romance!

Chapter:31