Sep 25, 2022
To:ArufaBeta
Since both kind of weave together, I'll say what I wanted to say in a single comment... I'm not so sure why the hells I did that, but damn, holding out the MCs name for so long seems to have misfired so freaking hard.
Basically, these two girls are the main duo, but it didn't feel right to simply throw their name right away, which in turn messed up, even more, some of the problems you had. This one is probably the easiest problem to solve of them all though, even if it takes a little bit of time to rewrite.
I'll need to read a bit more reading for the description and metaphorical parts though, I'm really bad at both (as one can see).
You have no idea how thankful I am for you taking the time to help me. Stay strong.
