Jul 05, 2022
I find it amusing that you are creating a story about... well creating stories.
If you don't mind, there were 2 things that I felt that may help. The first paragraphs had a lot of telling of himself. That generally does not help with maintaining interest, especially when it's a list of information about the main character. I would consider a more eyecatching way to start off.
You site several titles, which I know nothing about, but I assume others do. Name drops of such things with general what-ifs don't give me a tangible hook to grasp Taiyo's passion. I'm left with a bit of void in understanding what motivates him. What about those titles brings up dreams of fantasy worlds and adventure? Just something to consider.
