Jun 13, 2024
To:Bubbles
A BUBS appears! *Point back emoji*
Thank you so much for the critique! It might sound weird, but having someone giving healthy criticism to my writing is always a breath of fresh air. Not that praises aren't appreciated and loved, or that others haven't given me any reviews lately, but I'm always open to suggestions and changes where improvements are possible, and this workshop is really good for that.
Personally, I feel like I've been falling into patterns in my writing, for better or worse, so seeing what others say helps combat that.
So first, I definitely fixed the fauna/flora mix up right away. I'll be scolding myself later for that one😅
As for the other suggestions and changes, I'm going to keep everything you said in mind and see if I can do some edits here (and also keep it in mind for anything I make in the future.) I think you hit the nail on the head when you compared the structure to visual media. I tend to imagine my story is like a video in my head, so that possibly has a hand in that? I'm not sure. I'll be mulching over everything for a bit.
Again, thank you very much for the critique! 
(Also, completely unrelated side note, but I just discovered I can make the comment box bigger lol comments are so much easier now)
I'm glad you liked it!