Jun 28, 2023

We're on the weakest chapter so far, if character dialogue could come into its own more & feel like each person has a more personal, partial grasp of the world in which they live (and not a narrator's pov) we're looking at some gooood stuff!
Keep up the great work!! 😤🔥

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Jun 28, 2023

Oh, to be a baker with a pitchfork, off on the beginnings of my grand adventure to defeat the Great Evil Witch and claim my rightful place amongst the heroic bakers of old...
What's that? I'm gonna catch a smack-down in the first 2500 words of the story? 😟
All that aside, this is a lot of fun! Glad to get some back-info on the witch's crime, although I still find myself yearning for some specific finesse or twist that ignites that spark between Oliver and Ms. Teleport-On-A-Hair-Trigger (oops). Happens to the best of us, lass. Overall enjoying this a lot!
Keep up the great work brotha!!

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Jun 26, 2023

To:Feyblue

oh don't you worry, you have all the ingredients in play to excellent effect. the barrier of "next chapter" is just a bit to chomp on, so keep building things up the way you have been 😎

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Jun 26, 2023

ayaa this writing takes me through so smooth like! Awesome character & vibrance in all of this, keep up the great work :)

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Jun 14, 2023

Ahhh thank you so much Gil! Your comment's a great honour to receive, I'm so glad that what I at least think is coming out is reaching. I can't promise that it won't simply be time spent with a story, no sincere direction or resolution, but I want to at least promise sincerity in the time spent with it 🙏 For that recognition I'm beside myself, thank you!! I'll keep going :)

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Jun 10, 2023

To:Kitsune

Ahhhw Kitsune thank you so much!! 😭❤️ I really appreciate you reading & your kind words! I hope to build this world out into something special! Always looking forward to Sakuta's next hijinks, keep up the good work 😎😎

It's interesting, as I was feeling things out it just felt right - but I think that the "proper" nouns feel very solid in time, including starting sentences capitally - I think since I'm playing with the idea of how transient the present is, taking away the "properness" of everything felt like the right perspective for my character to take.

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Jun 10, 2023

Yeeeaaaa!! Documaking in an MMO was something I never thought I'd see, love this

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Jun 09, 2023

this chapter is glistening

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