Feb 15, 2025
This story seems like it has solid potential so far. Also interested in the concept of "aliens" actually being another type of human.
However, while there's nothing wrong with multiple POVs, the transition between them is a bit disorienting. One chapter Sam has been rescued from sandworms, in the next we're suddenly in Stonehenge. A switch to this extent can exist, but since there's no connection made between the scenes, it may come off as very sudden.
You also do a pretty good job at writing descriptions. I can vividly see the scenes in my head, so the reading experience is fairly immersive. On the other hand, I do feel the writing could benefit by using fewer words. I find myself getting distracted by the words instead of the story if that makes sense.
I hope this doesn't seem like a negative comment. I'm of course no writing expert, but from a reader's perspective, these are just some things I picked up on and others may disagree. I wish you luck in the contest!
