Feb 03, 2026
Ok again I have to celebrate some of your writing. Brilliant work recalling the opening lines of the novel here at the start of this chapter. But back then he “knew” and now he “thought”. Excellent work.
That said, and I do not mean this in any bad way, if anything more a compliment, I didn’t really take this as a romance. Yuna seems more just like a friend than a love. So for the “romance” part of the spotlight romance, it feels a little muted. But still, I think it works. I would have liked more time with Yuna to get more development for her, but regardless, great work. They support one another but I don’t feel like Takumi’s growth was purely by her or because of her. Great work. I think you have a ton of solid foundation to build on. Spend a little more time and effort on grammar next project, and take the feedback you’ve gotten, while nurturing your natural talent, and you’ll be amazing.
Thanks for a pleasant, lovely read.
