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Live in the present and enjoy reading
What is an Achievement?
Aug 28, 2021
Haha Dolly's lack of social skills is a great pairing for Noah's personality! The part were she thinks he's confessing to her is great and I could easily see being an overdramatic and hilarious scene
It's definitely an improvement from your last chapter. Exposition was a lot, but not overbearing and you had a better flow with this one.
Kazuma's flustered monologue of the sidewalk's beauty😂. That one got me.
Got to love anime dads that fawns over there daughters to an absurd amount 😂
To:senpaibaby
He’s the best for a reason
I liked this one a lot! Your dialogue was great and I liked the banter between the two of them
Aug 27, 2021
To:countlesscreator
I've been trying to make Ava a 'slow burn' in terms of her development, so I'm glad it's still intense!
Aug 25, 2021
I love this. The main character is great with his internal thoughts and I’m excited how his interactions with Prius and I’m sure the rest of the old gang will be on the trip to crescent falls!
The more I read this, the more it reminds me slightly of Akame ga kill, but better and with a wayyyyy more interesting main character. Keep the writing coming!
I really like how different you've made the outland compared to Zerin. I feel it further cements the differences between the humans and the 'savages'
The world you are building is highly creative and most definitely enough to hook people. There were parts of this chapter that I felt were a little heavy with exposition, but overall I still felt your writing was very well crafted. Your MC has a lot of potential and the makings of a great lead in the world you've created!
Aug 23, 2021
Okay I really like this idea you having going on. I'm always fascinated by vehicles that travel in the sky like trains, boats, etc.
To:daizyluv
Thank you! I do my best to not introduce characters that aren't going to be major parts of the story.
To:Deleted User
Oh yeah she's pretty cool
Aug 22, 2021
Thank you! I really hope the direction I go with this story and how Milo's and Ava's relationship unfolds stays interesting.
