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Live in the present and enjoy reading
What is an Achievement?
Jul 19, 2021
To:mikasajean
Thank you for reading! Next chapter will be up soon!
Jul 17, 2021
To:Syed Al Wasee
I gave it a read. So far I've enjoyed it. I left a comment on your first chapter with more of my thoughts.
I like the character and the story set up so far. A failing writer, pushed to the brink by the success of a lesser writer in his eyes; it has the makings of a good comedy piece. The MC will definitely have to develop but that's what more chapters are for! I'll make sure to stayed tuned.
I really like your main character so far. She's very spunky and of course demi-gods always make for interesting stories so I'll make sure to read your next chapter!
I like the start. You left an ending that makes you want to know more about the character/their backstory. One thing I'd suggest is that it may flow better if the story were told from a 1st person POV. Regardless I like how the story has been set up so far.
This chapter was a good contrast to the first. The first chapter was slow but was needed to understand the inner thoughts of Cobalt. It was the pacing of this chapter that I thought was the biggest improvement.
So far I've found the story interesting enough. I like the dark atmosphere of the book, but there is one thing I would work on in your future chapters. Akai is obviously going through major emotions and I feel it would be really effective if you displayed those emotions more through his actions. You are telling us how he feels and parts of that are great, but it would really add more variety and depth to your novel to show us his emotions instead of telling them and that will push it to another level.
Jul 14, 2021
Thank you! I decided to edit it to first person. Thought it would flow better. I will have the new chapter out soon!
