lolitroy / Comments

lolitroy

I usually read back as a courtesy but if you're gonna read JUST so I return the favor, heed my warning: I won't.

I do follow back in case it wasn't obvious, but I get bombarded by notifs (in case it wasn't obvious) from story updates, so if I haven't feel free to tell me in a comment or smth

apparently my writing style is too avant-garde for the weebs or some shit but if you ask me that's just a polite way to tell me I have terminal skill issue

registered at: Aug 04, 2022

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aaa

Jan 11, 2025

To:Hype

it was on jan 2

(I REALLY liked it but the ending is so fucking depressing what the euvk)

Usagi Days (Space Orcs Destroyed the Earth So Let's Deliver Packages in a Pink Kei-Car)

Chapter:50

Jan 11, 2025

ok no, edit this
this aint it

The World Doesn't Change So Easily

Chapter:39

Jan 11, 2025

holy summary...

The World Doesn't Change So Easily

Chapter:38

Jan 11, 2025

sheesh that was cold

The World Doesn't Change So Easily

Chapter:37

Jan 11, 2025

lots of interesting ideas these past two chapters but it's a shame it's told,,,
idk
I won't say poorly but yea actually
it's not necessarily the court scene on its own, but the two usual culprits getting possessed by the author yet again to yap about personal beliefs (not calling u a commie pls don't cancel me)
also I'd really advise you break the paragraphs down and maybe set the scene a bit more for the same reason as you advised me once, but especially the paragraphs because they are CHONKERS on mobile

The World Doesn't Change So Easily

Chapter:36

Jan 11, 2025

you ending it this way on my birthday feels like a targeted attack so no end of story chonker post for you

Usagi Days (Space Orcs Destroyed the Earth So Let's Deliver Packages in a Pink Kei-Car)

Chapter:50

Jan 11, 2025

anime

Memoria

Chapter:36

Jan 11, 2025

you're writing a dystopia for the harmonic future category

Bio-Shifter

Chapter:0

Jan 11, 2025

To:otkrlj

idk if this sounds cringe but I'd planned on reading half and half right
problem is I was too hooked and wanted to know what happened ;(

Iero

Chapter:23

Jan 11, 2025

To:otkrlj

throughout the book, but those two instances are the ones that took me out of the story
I used to do that too tbh but it's like
time and place ykno

Iero

Chapter:20

Jan 11, 2025

To:otkrlj

I kinda got the sense that she's brainwashed and thinks things will be a-ok while also trying not to worry but it could've been me speculating idk

Iero

Chapter:8

Jan 11, 2025

To:alextheoverlord

If you rewrite I'd be more than happy to read :D

The Purpose Finding Program

Chapter:20

Jan 11, 2025

idk why hf just yeeted me to the end aaaaa
caught up now

AIGHT
If I were to describe this in three words, it'd be cozy, but melancholic.
Throughout the story there's this feeling that Lena is constantly trying to fit it, but something's always slightly off, which makes her keep her feelings to herself and feel like an alien. Needless to say, this ending was a perfect way to wrap that up. At risk of sounding cliché, it do be a 'new beginning'.
Like I said, I like Lena as a character. She was cute and good-natured but also reasonably flawed (the i have it worse speech got in my nerves ngl) and imo developed naturally throughout the story. It would've been nicer for the ex thing to have some like... idk... maybe foreshadowing is not the right word. A bit more presence in the story? It kind of seemed to exist purely to give the story a last minute drama twist, idk.

Unfortunately, even with the efforts in later chapters, I still feel like side characters are mostly just kinda there. It's not that they don't have personality, but moreso that they didn't seem to be alive outside of their role in the story, if you know what I mean. Zan was 'friend', Gio was 'plot device so she can trauma dump by accident', Maria is 'cathartic realization', and so on and so forth. I did like the bit at the end with Gio and honestly think that gives him more personality than everyone else aside from Lena combined, but it still kind of felt like he exists just so the story could happen.

Still, it was a cozy read, and I enjoyed it. Were there times where it felt like things were just kind of happening for no rhyme or reason? Sure, but that's honestly one of the charms of slice of life. I don't read them looking for a high stakes plot or much rising action. It was something comfy to chill to, and if it got animated, it's the kind of thing I'd watch after a long day at work. Congrats on finishing, and thank you for writing c:

The Purpose Finding Program

Chapter:20

Jan 11, 2025

I know lena is naive but man, she REALLY had to play the i've had it worse card huh

The Purpose Finding Program

Chapter:16

Jan 11, 2025

awe

is it bc i havent read this in a while
I don't recallthe pov being omniscient but maybe im crazy

The Purpose Finding Program

Chapter:20

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