May 25, 2025
Okay, I'm not gonna lie, when I read the name "James", I had a feeling that he wouldn't be a character who would have much prominence over the story. His name has a lot less prominence compared to the rest of the cast... So around the time Napoleon walked up to the king, I had a sense that the King was already dead HAHA
And THEN I realized the meaning behind the chapter title 
it flew over my head.
Either way, this is a great first chapter. There's a lot, a LOT to unpack here. I think Trojia was excellently built up to be a fascinating character. Her perspectives are fascinating, and though she has long dialogues explaining her own reasonings, the dialogues are constructed in a way that isn't just "hey, she is right and this is what the author thinks".
And currently, it feels like Trojia's definition of being a villain isn't quite what a regular person defines to be a "villain", so it makes me a bit curious on what she really means to do.
Now, I do want to mention that there were some things that took time to figure out while reading:
1. The first two sentences of the story has a "zoom in" effect to King James, which is AWESOME after figuring it out, but I initially interpreted it as the author describing three different kings HAHA
2. I didn't realize Niomyo was not a princess until Drey was introduced. There are hints of her being a "mere" escort to Trojia (ex: mention of her wearing light armor), but I don't think it was mentioned explicitly what Niomyo's role was in the story. Trojia was mentioned to be a princess by Niomyo by Trojia (which was a good way to not rub the fact all over the reader's face), but the role of Niomyo only had a few hints here and there. A part of me does think that I just suck at reading, but I do want to leave this note because it did happen while I was reading. Because this is a foreign world where the "old" clashes with the "new" (Ex: an elevator is being constructed), I do think some things need explicit clarification. A princess wearing armor could definitely be possible in this world, so explicitly mentioning Niomyo's status (but not necessarily in an "overkill" way) could be beneficial.
Now, I do want to mention that I think this chapter would benefit from polish. For example, there's a sentence in here that lacks a proper punctuation at the end ("yet another long flight of stairs"). And I think a few parts of the story could benefit from better grammar (ah yes, grammar... the one thing I dislike talking about... which is also unfortunately the thing that I always end up noticing).
And this was probably written before you realized that a lot of dialogues that end with dialogue tags (ex: "Hi," she said) end with commas instead of a period, so I want to point that out, too.
Getting that all aside, I want to clarify that this is a very strong chapter with a strong premise. Trojia is already a fascinating character, and the general cast of characters promise to create unique interactions between her and the rest of the world... and of course, the other protagonist, Ubica, hasn't even been introduced yet. I do have a feeling that Ubica will serve as an excellent foil to Trojia. I mean, Trojia already stands out without the Utica as a foil, so imagine what will happen when the contrast is revealed...
My personal hope for this chapter, though it is entirely up to you, that this chapter is polished and formalized. Other than that, excellent.
And as a side note, this is one of those chapters where a reader could benefit from re-reading. This is a good thing, because this means that a reader can go back and pick up new details if they want to learn more about the world. So in gaming terms, this chapter has replayability, haha.
I like this chapter. It's very long, but it allows the scene to play out from beginning to end without cuts. And the imagery is on point (though my brain sometimes has a hard time following along due to my own inexperience).
the contents were excellent.
priorities, am I right?