Jul 20, 2022
mfs out here gamifying relationships like this is stardew valley.
On a more serious note – and at the risk of sounding pedantic – that little philosophical bit in the beginning really feels like a square peg in a round hole. I think it's fine if you want to insert some meditation in your novel, but the way you went about it feels far too direct and far too out of tune with the narrative tone, especially when aligned with what happens next. I think you could've done well to exemplify that message subtly either through visual parallels, anecdotes or something less abstract, as opposed to the very blunt 'transience of life' comment.
Other than that, I'm in awe at the normalisation of this wingman phenomenon. Narratively, it's a very interesting thing. Exaggerated for the animeist comedy and as my meme above relayed, 'gamified'. It's a rather interesting journey to embark on, especially with what Makoto's fear and his interaction with Uyeno might foreshadow. Not to mention how obsessive these people seem to be, flocking to those they essentialise as their kin. Pretty good job, my guy you get a 
