Jul 28, 2021
Hiho.
I must say that when I read the title, the actual twist was nowhere in sight for me. And whilst I prided myself in knowing a book from its cover, synopsis and title, this was among the few who have actually befuddled me. But enough about introduction, let's get to the review, shall we?
The atmospheric feel of the writing is definitely a strong point here that should be further explored. The artistic images are abundant, from the auditory pitter-patter of the rain to the pastel of hydrangea flowers sat in a neat little garden, it's a festival of the senses. Alas, one that is simply stated. It really begs the question whether something existing is simply enough to warrant beauty. It might be better if elements in a description actually held more meaning to the eye of the beholder rather than just a simple stating, wouldn't they?
Plot-wise, the pacing is what I feel is the most uncertain, mostly because it's inconsistent. Some episodes are narrated in a very melancholic, overtly descriptive way, to the point where they become droning, like the brief respite between the two meetings. Whereas others, particularly around the dialogues have a perfect mixture of slowness and dynamic that makes them flow as naturally as they can. The issue with the former elements is their length and lack of overall meaning. Long paragraphs that go over inconsequential after inconsequential, adding nothing more than a drop of rain barely audible in the monsoon outside.
The characters are nice as they are. I believe the boy to be quite introspective for his young age, but that isn't as unbelievable as one might think. Personally, I find it fascinating when the youth is more developed, spiritually, then an adult. As for his inner monologue, limited as it is, I suppose it makes sense for it to be so, therefore it gets a pass. The dynamic between him and his ex-girlfriend is truly something worth studying more, and I want to praise you for introducing such a fascinating relationship to this prompt. Not really much to detract here.
As for the style, oof, now we're getting into my specialty. I would say there is a 'je ne sais quoi' missing, but I'd be lying. There is a flow problem afoot, one that is perfectly obvious in the way information is presented to us. It's lacking cohesion, we are being shown the rain and then a little story. One's mind would try to seek a connection between these two events, but apart from a general veil of sadness none is drawn. It's deceiving the reader with a false affectionate memory... And as far as descriptions go, spacing them out with bits of information could work, definitely, but for that to happen, there needs to be perfect correlation between elements. From a style point of view, that doesn't happen...
Alas, I think I've expressed enough here. A very good effort and an extremely interesting premise that alone is bound to draw you in. Probably just enough to overlook the other qualms.
That's it.
Bubbles, out.