Feb 20, 2022
Blue said it was a genius plot twist, and I kind of have some gripes with that. It wasn’t really a plot twist, for one- just the opposite side of the murder. However interesting it was, I can’t really consider it a plot twist.
Now, don’t get me wrong in all this. This chapter is probably your strongest so far. Individually, I’d give this one a nine. Though, combined with the others, the book’s still hanging at a 7.5. My only issues with this chapter in specific are the long paragraphs. Personally, I would chop them down or split them if necessary. Reading through massive chunks of text is hard, which is what might’ve given Blue his impression of what happened in the chapter versus what actually occurred. Still, very good.
On the topic of Isaiah’s betrayal, I’d say it wasn’t super hard to see coming. Then again, we’d only known him for, quite literally, one chapter. If we’d had a lot of time to connect and bond with Janus, Hua, and Isaiah, this betrayal would be so much more gripping. If you ever rewrite this, that would be something really good to add.
Well, as far as I can tell, this is the last chapter as of now, so my reviews, too, have to come to a halt. I’ll be checking it out when you next publish, though.
Have a good day, again. :3
