Dec 15, 2021
To:Vnator
Well firstly I'm just glad I didn't come across as an asshole๐๐.
As for your question I hesitate to say too much as I haven't finished the book, and only arrogant fools give absolutes on something they don't wholly understand (insert 'only the sith deal in absolutes' quote)
With that said you have a few choices. For one like you said, you could literally just change the tag to a 'parody' rather then a deconstruction.
Konosuba is a parody and it's great. The point is to remember that parodys and deconstructions have common elements but that doesn't make them the same thing if that makes any sense.
However sticking with the deconstruction idea, you mention your two themes in your below comment and if what you want is to further break then down, then what you maybe need to ask yourself is 'what am I saying?'.
Rigth now this book is more a commentary, your writing a fun story, while periodically pointing out some troop or other from the genre.
{I apologize if I'm about to spoil an anime for you I'll try to be vague in the details๐
} You name two themes which are perfectly serviceable ordinarily. Thing is how are they deconstructing anything?
Think of Madoka Magica', it deconstructs it's genre by breaking everything with a seldge-hammer;
Cute cuddly maskot character? - Is secretly an alien-evil-devil-creature.
Fun magic battles? - Are life and death events where you trade your own soul for more power.
The girls are essential immortal and never really at risk of death becuase it's for children - Ya.....
Let's focus on that last point. In a regular magical girl show you don't kill off characters from the main cast (backstory and side characters can die but even that's general religated to flashbacks and mentors, and isn't overly common).
Now ask yourself why not? Why don't we want to teach children about death? That they're heros can die in vain?
The answers may seem obvious and on a surface level they most certainly are but themeically it's becuase these shows are about Hope.
Showing the magical girl as falible is fine, good even. She can worry about school bullies or the 'big dance nigth on Saturday', becuase the little girl's/boys watching have those same fears but if in real life they fail, it's ok, they can try again.
The magical girls can always come back, no matter how many times the big-bad defeats them, they get rigth back up and figth on.
But if they die, die in vain then where is that hope? What was the point of it all?
Sure you could use that to teach kids about death but thematically it just isn't the goal of the genre.
This is what Madoka hones in on, for all people who don't think enough critise it as perverse, it's written by a guy who understands the genre, it breaks everything down to it's absolute worst, kills everyone, ruins the world and at it's very worst - There is still a glimmer of hope.
That is positive deconstructionism. I could give you the School days example of negative but I think you get the point.
(I really should of used my computer to type this out, my poor thumbs๐๐๐๐).
Now taking it that isekai is a positive genre at its heart and that you don't intend this to be depressing but rather antryim's journey to be about/of understanding the upside of isekais, then your already on the rigth track.
You've identified the main theme of 'second chances' with a nice secondary one about the value of heros.
Now personally there'd be a few ways to go about this.
You could have a protag who hated his previous life, arrives in a new world that's even worse then earth and over his horrific journey, realises that no matter how terrible the world is, He still has a chance to be the best he can be, that he can't control the world but he can take personal responsibility over his own life (Grimgar ain't deconstruction but you can see a bit of this in that)
Alternately he could perhaps of been a total dickhead in his past life, do a sort of Christmas Carrol thing with some mass-murdering criminal being reborn and deciding to be a nice guy - with the twists being others finding out who he is, imprissoning him etc but him still striving to prove he's worth a second chance, eventually being the only one who can saves those who wronged him for the sins of his previous life - Messages about forgiveness and accepting all in our society ya-da ya-da.
Now as for where we are with this story your biggest problem by far is Antrim - He isn't a deconstruction protagonist.
In Madoka Magica', Madoka is an architipal magical girl. Pink hair, petite body, 'girly', loving family unit with a mom she idolises, loves stuffed animals and dreams of being a 'frilly' cutesy magical girl with all her best friends protecting there city and their loved ones.
This is important, you see the same thing in most deconstructions becuase the point is to start at the same place a regular show would start.
The protagonist is often being deconstructed just as much as the story.
Anytrim is to much of a person. He starts off old, grisseled and cynical. He already believes that 'Promise of a Wonderful Fantasy was a Lie', he doesn't need convincing.
He's also omnipresent (a difficulty for any writers protagonist). Like sure he doesn't know the mystery of this world but the information about a billion other worlds and god's, the power to call upon an army with only the waiting of some paperwork, top level combat and magic skills etc, put him in a both really interesting but really awkward place.
It's hard to describe in this text box but essentially becuase antryim and the audience already know isekais suck, the first 30 chapters of this book are themeically just a hunt to prove that fact.
It isn't surprizing that the goddess is maybe evil because both Antyrim and us are expecting that. By having him be an X-protagonist your skipping the parts of Madoka where she is exposed to the mortality of magical girls and the abuse of the world. Anytrim already know it all.
This in itself could certainly still work but it requires a different method - Your starting with Homura rather then Madoka.
To give an analogue, it's like your writing a rom-com and your first episode starts with the main couple kissing. - That would make for a Great premise but require a different method to the usual 'will-they won't-they shenanigans.
First 10ish chapters work. Seeing ruthless antryim turn down the presitess. Seeing how much more natural the rookie party is compared to Tommy's group, seeing the people of the world and the effects of the dark lord - all great, they Show us who this character is, rather then just telling me he's glummy.
Everything in the second town? Scrap. Lord cabifour and his guard are lovely but throw it out.
The most memorable characters are the map makers and that one random preistess.
Have a single line of dialogue after the rookie party arc;
"Following the lead with a heavy-heart anytrim made his way to Town B. After quickly replenishing his supplies and catching his breath for a day, with some asking around he found himself starting at a generic wooden sign. What caugth his attention was it's apparent youth, looking as though it had only recently been mounted with the words 'Kobald Crossing' hastily carved into it"
Go from there and have it be Tommy who rescues antryim from the foreman and is impressed by the army of dead kobalds.
The story would just be a whole lot more fluid. You wouldn't lose enough to warrant keeping Anytrim's solo stint but instead you'd free up more room.
It suffices to say that deconstructions are tricky things especially within anime.
Parody not deconstruction = Konosuba, Martian successor Nadesco'.
Not a Deconstruction but with elements of the genre = ReZero, Shuffle & of course Evangellion.(heck even original Gundam would be eligible for this catagory).
The point being that to further deconstruct isekai you need to start getting into the characters heads. 'why do god's need other-worlders rather then blessing their own people?' (you've possibly got an answer for this with the taint).
'Why do they pick generic Japanese teenagers'
'Why do the girls faun all over them'
'Why are the protags so competent here when they were 'worthless before'.(This one is key, to show that the protag always had potential - Ergo the isekai world is just plain hell but he becomes the hero, not by blessing but hard work and dedication. That would be the simply deconstruction-esk story for isekai)
I can't truely give any overview till I've finished the whole novel but hopefully something in this disection is vaguely helpful ๐๐๐๐.
(r.i.p my thumbs)
