Jan 01, 2025
aight here goes, with the heavy disclaimer that I know many, if not most, of the nitpicks would go away with more time/a higher word count (which tbh applies to most entries)
It's really hard to write this schizopost in particular because it's hard to know where to START. I don't know, if it were a published book, I wouldn't be able to rate it, because while I think it achieved what it was trying to do, it wasn't 'enjoyable' in the sense that the things it explores are uncomfortable, and time constraints held it back from the kind of polishing that'd make it pull through anyway.
First off, when I started to read this, I did NOT expect Sprout to become a Jack London protagonist by the end. That cover is borderline false advertising. I thought it'd be more of a road trip with shenanigans type of story, so when everything began to go wrong I assumed it'd be the usual 'heroes pull thru with determination and the power of anime' but lol
While I think the characters were 'presented' enough at first, so to say... I just couldn't care. Sorry, but they were fodder. This is purely a me thing, but I find it really hard to get invested as soon as it's apparent something's going to become That kind of story. There has to be a very strong component elsewhere, and maybe the themes might've been a contender, but then it just feels like the world existed to be Sprout's omedeto fodder. And what's more, Sprout herself was highly unlikeable to me and remained the same to the end. If anything, she got even worse as the story went on. Now, I don't blame her with what happens, obviously, but her being so callous, dismissive and, frankly, selfish isn't a creative decision I can say I understand if basically nothing and no one else matters. I don't know, it seems like other people liked her. I just REALLY didn't. With that said, this didn't make me like or dislike the story by itself (many of my favorite stories have terrible people as mcs), just... yeah. Made it hard to get invested in her plight. It doesn't help that the 'but I'm human' thing kind of shows up out of nowhere and I'm TOLD by the characters that she's obsessed with them while she shows little to no real desire other than to have the aesthetic of one or idek. Also, her casual genocide made the 'noo don't kill her' scene fall flat. Like I KNOW she did it to survive and that the other scene would've led to death out of hatred, but it's almost like she can't connect two and two, or maybe it's just my personal beliefs clashing with hers, because murder is murder. It's not like the outcome changes if you hate your victim less ykno. There were several instances like these where morality seemed to change based on what the scene wanted to achieve rather than characters having a particularly strong stance on the subject, so at some point even Sprout felt mind controlled by The Theme(TM). At least she had character, though. As for the rest...
Fodder with no tragic backstory flashback. Now, did I like them? Sure, because I'm the kind of person to reset quests until everyone survives, NPC or not. Was I sad about what happened to them? Sure, for the same reason. I don't know, they had a baseline personality shown at first, with their own problems and ambitions, and tensions between then DID evolve as the story went on which made me interested in their plight, but then they turned into cat chow. Potential thrown out the window. It was aight the first time, but by the end it was almost funny. And for what? 'I am what I am'? Life is tough and then you die? They died like beasts, and it wasn't their fault. Now, could that be by design? I mean... sure? But then how am I supposed to care if they're treated as artificial sacrifices so the Story can happen? Were any of them people, or just shadows? This goes for both the main cast and "antagonists". I don't know, people mock tragic backstory dumps in anime, but they're there for a reason. Those seldom work in text (for me anyway) which is why we use the available tools in our medium. Since the story was Sprout's and Sprout's only, this might've been a futile endeavor from the start, especially with the word count, but I've seen authors pull this off before by focusing on the fodder in subtly deceptive ways that might make them seem like they're along for the ride. When I see vague outlines of people I expect that they'll get developed later, so this could also just be me as a reader being disappointed at MY idea of what could've been. I'm not good with stories with fodder characters in general. Still, I can't help but feel like everyone was too flat to 'care care', and it didn't help that Sprout herself seemed to give 0 fucks. I thought that might be a cat thing, but the Oliver and Lea showed human (lol) emotions, so idek anymore. Ares did nothing wrong?
Characters aside, obviously, I was interested in the story, or else I wouldn't be clicking the moment a chapter dropped. I'll admit that near the end it was more bile fascination than anything else, but I found that once the story found its footing rather than them scrambling around (for understandable reasons), it was a lot easier to follow despite my interest in the main plight dropping as the story went on. Even when certain set-ups were repeated multiple times with exactly the same resolution, I legitimately looked forward to see what happened next.
You mentioned that you think your prose is 'repetitive' but it seems fine to me. Sprout sounds her age. I could always follow along and know what was happening, and the action scenes were honestly great. Honestly, I feel like those were the highest points of the story. Perks of having a weapon of mass destruction catgirl mc. Couldn't be me ahHAHah
I'm not sure how to feel about the ending, either. Now, I think it worked. I think you nailed it. Again, the... transitions... near the end could've used a bit more fleshing out, but time/word constraints. Now, did it tie to The Theme(TM)? Yeah... the ending was the theme. No one and nothing else really mattered. The mcguffin had 0 real bearing on it, which was aight. Sprout's ultimate conclusion does have a ground to stand on, though the place she ends at makes it feel almost existentially depressing. She is what she is. Life is tough and then you die. We're all fodder. Watsonian determinism won and she's just coming to terms with it, forever discontent, bitter, and traumatized. Like I'm not good with multiple character deaths, I'm not good with bleak endings... or maybe you meant for it to be more hopeful, as in, we choose our own destiny, but do we really? She tries and fails to be something else. Her people are hated and it feels like the story actually gives valid reasons as to why they should be feared beyond social conditioning. I don't think you were going for a fantasy racism angle, but a common point of contention is that hatred/fear for the 'other' race IS validated. Now, I'm not talking about what happened to Sprout the last chapter because that was just the icing on the cake for her torture, but prior events do kind of suggest the idea that maybe they're cats and that's how things are and that's okay, but is it? Will there able be a compromise? In the future, maybe, but at that point it's just speculation. In real life, it DOES happen that a group isolates itself to cope with hatred from outside, which makes it hard for both parties to accept, let alone understand, each other, but like... they're not mass murderer catgirls. Also, and this is just me maybe reading too much into it, but a lot of the antagonistic faction's actions seemed almost cartoonishly evil. It was diabolus ex machina 101, everything and everyone set out to be as cruel as possible with --> VALIDATED <-- fear as an alibi. Why do you even want to be human, Sprout, other than themes mind controlling you? Again, is it the aesthetic? 'I am what I am'. Sure, whatever.
With all the pedantic nitpicking it might seem like I didn't actually enjoy the story, and while that's true in the sense that it didn't have a lot of the things I "like", I also like when things make me uncomfortable, and this story did that. It made me think a lot and consider some things in my own life, for better or worse. It's easy to say 'you can be whatever you want!!!1' and move on with your day, but life doesn't work like that. If you want to be something you're not, the road ahead is painful, steep, and might have no summit. Perhaps we really can't change some things. We can just try to while coping with our bleak existence. Not all of us can be 'human', but what's stopping us from calling ourselves that? Is it so bad to comfort yourself with impossible goals? I think the line about her saying her identity is an easy way to differentiate herself will stick with me for a long time. I mean, it's true. It is an easy way to alienate yourself from everything else. It's also a dangerous rabbit hole to jump into. Next thing you know, you have an us vs. them mentality, thinking everyone hates you and that you're fundamentally different and there's nothing you can do about it. It's how you get extremists of all sorts in real life. It's fine to have a less romantic view of the world without mocking it or glamorizing nihilism. In fact, it's not something I see often. This story is what it is. It doesn't have to be one or the other. We don't have to be one or the other.
