Jul 14, 2023
Damn, a character name Natsu, i approve as someone who also name Natsu (actually it translate from my name here) and yes i walk naked in house lmao. Joke aside, if u mind little critique i have few things to point out. So get ready.
Narration is bit too long, i know it necessary but at least press Enter every 3 or 4 lines of text. It make me easier to read and other to read especially someone who get lost in sea of text like me
I dont know mate, is it intentional or not? Sora sound like girlish name for me but not gonna complain about that. In the Sora dialog when he wakes up walk out of the room is little bit chaotic. You could enter each dialog but if intention to make it looks like chaos so its fine.
Good start anyway, i dont expect much about introduction but well done. Introduce best girl early and story paced looks like that Sora is total introvert guy. Well to next chapter, off I go.
