Mario Nakano 64 / Comments

Mario Nakano 64

It's a me. I'm an aspiring light novel writer hoping to one day see my works in anime form. I hope that my works at least brighten up your day and give you something to look forward to.

registered at: Jun 30, 2023

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aaa

Mar 08, 2025

This chapter was absolutely hilarious, especially the comments. I get the feeling there's also gonna be an element of "don't get caught as the one with the kaiju" vibes that could add some elements of tension and suspense to the story, as well as lead to comedic moments as well. Keep up the good work.

I Prolonged the World’s Demise by Babysitting a Kaiju

Chapter:3

Mar 08, 2025

And cue the title drop.

I Prolonged the World’s Demise by Babysitting a Kaiju

Chapter:2

Mar 08, 2025

Well, at least this arc is getting to the action faster than the Shujinko arc. Still not a fan of all the perspective shifts. Perhaps if all these characters were introduced at the start instead of midway through the story, I could better get behind seeing things from their perspectives, but in it's current state, I'm not a fan of the overall layout of this story. Taking a look back at the first chapter, I do think there are opportunities to better introduce the extended cast. It would come at the cost of not jumping immediately into the Helios 9 action, but I feel that maybe having the story start out with the lecture, then shift to shit going down at Helios 9 would be a better way to structure events. Same could be said for Shachiko. I do feel his arc is doing a better job of conveying the "something's off" vibes you were trying to instill in the Shujinko arc, but the problem is that we shift over to this new character immediately after the tension and intrigue was beginning to peak for the Shujinko arc. At the end of the day though, you are the author and have the final say in the structure of the story, but I just felt I'd offer my insights as I feel this could be a really good thriller if better structured.

Concrete Coffin

Chapter:17

Mar 08, 2025

Oh no, not again. Things were getting good, but now there's another perspective shift to a brand new character? Definitely not a fan of this direction for the story. On a separate, more humorous note, when I first received the notification for this chapter's release, I got confused as I thought you had somehow uploaded a chapter to my novel, Sales Pitch, but then I looked closely and saw "Sales Pitch" was just the chapter title.

Concrete Coffin

Chapter:16

Mar 08, 2025

Hold on, did the mercs just escape with Kaiju? As for the chapter, this is probably the best one of the Shujinko arc. Unlike the other chapters, this one is more inline with the tone and tension of the Helios 9 segment, and fits as a "seen from the outside" perspective. With the element of someone leaving Helios 9 now on the table, an element of mystery is now added to the story. Is that Kaiju and the mercs, or someone else? Honestly, this chapter should have happened much earlier as I feel it would have helped better maintain the tension and tone of the Helios 9 segment when the perspective shift first occurred.

Concrete Coffin

Chapter:15

Mar 08, 2025

I've said it before, but I'll say it again, the shift from Helios 9 to Shujinko and co is a really drastic tonal shift, one I feel is more detrimental than good. Here, the mood of the story is "Something seems of", which could work in some settings. The problem is that we the reader already know of what went down and are more engrossed in said action compared to Shujinko's shounen protagonist arc. I can see what you're trying to do by showing a different side to the story, but I feel the execution of it hasn't been great.

Concrete Coffin

Chapter:14

Mar 08, 2025

Yeah, Shujinko just isn't doing it for me. Easily my least favorite character thus far.

Concrete Coffin

Chapter:13

Mar 08, 2025

[Game log #238]

Here's the bughouse game from Chapter 372 between Iori and Okisato and Alice and Mimosa during the 6B unofficial tournament.

B1
[Event "6B unofficial tournament"]
[Site "Budapest, Hungary"]
[Date "2024.09.21"]
[Round "?"]
[White "Alice Utsugi (2442)"]
[Black "Iori Ishikiridokoro (2444)"]
[Result "0-1"]

1. e4 f6 2. d4 Kf7 3. Bc4+ e6 4. Qh5+ g6 5. Qf3 a6 6. d5 b5 7. dxe6+ dxe6 8. Bd3 Nd7 9. p@f5 exf5 10. exf5 Rb8 11. Qa8 Rxa8 12. Nc3 Ne5 13. Ne4 Nxd3+ 14. cxd3 Qxd3 15. Nc3 N@c2# 0-1

B2
[Event "6B unofficial tournament"]
[Site "Budapest, Hungary"]
[Date "2024.09.21"]
[Round "?"]
[White "Okisato Tanabe (2700)"]
[Black "Mimosa Utsugi (2442)"]
[Result "1-0"]

1. f3 e5 2. Kf2 Qh4+ 3. g3 Qd4+ 4. e3 Qb6 5. c4 d5 6. cxd5 Nf6 7. Nc3 p@d4 8. Ne4 Nxe4+ 9. fxe4 Bg4 10. Qxg4 Qd6 11. Q@c8+ Qd8 12. Bb5+ c6 13. dxc6 dxe3+ 14. dxe3 bxc6 15. Bxc6+ Nxc6 16. Qgd7# 1-0

Okisato-Iori: black pawn, white pawn, black bishop, white queen (dropped), black pawn, black knight (dropped) white bishop, white pawn, black pawn, black pawn.

Mimosa-Alice: white pawn (dropped), black pawn (dropped), white knight, black knight, white pawn, white pawn, white bishop.

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:372

Mar 07, 2025

To:SkeletonIdiot

Perhaps there's some canonical significance as to why that is.

Sales Pitch

Chapter:10

Mar 07, 2025

To:Elukard

She'll definitely get a punishment fitting for what she's done.

Sales Pitch

Chapter:10

Mar 07, 2025

[Game log #237]

Here's the 4-player free-for-all chess match between teams Australia, Montenegro, Sweden, and Bulgaria during the 6B unofficial tournament.

[Event "6B unofficial tournament"]
[Site "Budapest, Hungary"]
[Date "2024.09.21"]
[Round "?"]
[Red "Team Australia (Francie Dering (2068), Kandi Cotten (1969), Marigold Flower (2255), Imogen Cryer (2155), and Myrtle Foat (1976))"]
[Blue "Team Montenegro (Mirjana Majić (2615), Ilyana Gvozdenović (2035), Miku Baćović (2239), Morfydd Baćović (2179), and Buddug Baćović (2121))"]
[Yellow "Team Sweden (Petra Cronholm (2550), Dagmar Bergsten (2197), Agneta Cronholm (2175), Helle Dahl (2076), and Agnes Englund (2009))"]
[Green "Team Bulgaria (Radina Rangelova (2516), Kalina Karaslavova (2412), Donka Donchova (2297), Yordanka Dancheva (2295), and Elitsa Zlatkova (2248))"]
[Result "Team Australia: 0 - Team Montenegro: 24 - Team Sweden: 18 - Team Bulgaria: 30"]

1. h4 d7 h11 l6 2. h5 e7 g12 Nl9 3. h6 Bc8 f12 Qxi2+# 4. Bxi2 Qh13 k4 5. Qd5 Ni12 k5 6. f7 Nj10 Nk7 7. g7 Qg13 j4 8. h7=Q Bh13 l9 9. Qk4 O-O-O Rxk4 10. Bxk4 i11 Nl4 11. Qxg2 Bi12 k8 12. Qi2 Ki13 Bm8 13. d4 Ki14 O-O 14. e4 i10 Nj5 15. f4 Qi11 Ni3 16. g4 Nl11+ 10xl11 17. h4=Q Qxl11 Nxk4 18. Qxk4 Qh7+ Bn7 19. Qxh7 Ng13 Bm8 20. Ql11 Kj14 l7 21. Qf6 Nf11 Bl8 22. Qk11 Bxl8+ Rm9 23. Qxm11+ Bxm9+ Kn9 24. Qxm9+# Nd10 25. Qi13+ Kk14 26. Rxj4 Nxb9+ 27. Ka6 j12 28. Rxj12 Nxa11 29. Qxk13+ Kxk13 30. Qk11+#

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:371

Mar 06, 2025

[Game log #236]

Here's the Chaturaji game from Chapter 370 between teams Croatia, Philippians, Lithuania, and the New Republic of Paeonia during the 6B unofficial tournament.

[Event "6B unofficial tournament"]
[Site "Budapest, Hungary"]
[Date "2024.09.21"]
[Round "?"]
[Red "Team Croatia (Dunja Sabolić (2259), Snežana Zebić (2101), Nela Bošković (2134), Dijana Sabolić (2143), and Vlatka Jurkovič (2094))"]
[Blue "Team Philippians (Queenie Lauzon (2013, Kristel Lapid (2216), Luzviminda Angara (2165), Inday Mangubat (2004), and Glaiza Quitoriano (2012))"]
[Yellow "Team Lithuania (Ugnė Šaulytė (2177), Ingrida Šepetys (2176), Živilė Radžvilas (2103), Eglė Vizgirda (2007), and Jūratė Vyšniauskas (2005))"]
[Green "Team New Republic of Paeonia (Barbro Zamenhofo (2759), Raĥelo Janjo (1859), Ofelio Kano (2107), Biljana Ilievska (2106), and Nevena Zograf (2239))"]
[Result "Team Croatia: 5 - Team Philippians: 3 - Team Lithuania: 0 - Team New Republic of Paeonia: 4"]

1. b3 c5 e6 f3 2. Bb2 Bb5+ Be7+ f4 3. Bc3+ Bxe8# e3 4. Bxa5# 3xd2 5. Bxd2 Bg4+ 6. Bxf4 Nf3 7. R

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:370

Mar 06, 2025

Whelp, "The End" I guess.

Sucky Apocalypse

Chapter:5

Mar 06, 2025

If I'm being honest, Shujinko's story so far pales in comparison to the opening act in Helios 9. I'm also just not really liking him compared to Ichiban and Kaiju, and him being typical shounen protagonist archetype isn't helping on selling his character to me, nor is the chapter's title. I said before that Shujinko's story could be interesting, but this chapter, in my opinion, did not do a good job of that as right now, a typical shounen protagonist vs bully fight pales in comparison to the tone and tension of the chapters set in Helios 9. I'll still read this story to completion, but I feel this focus on Shujinko is really bogging down the story.

Concrete Coffin

Chapter:12

Mar 05, 2025

Wholesome goblin x human romance? That's a unique and creative approach. Interested to see where it will go from here.

Fight for you

Chapter:1

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