Sep 18, 2021
Seems like I've been invoked by Tomoyuki. I shall provide some enlightenment on the matter, but after the focus of this chapter. First off, Leilandry literally made a 'it's not the size, it's how you use it' reference. She is the chaddest character so far. Heart react.
Y'know, as someone who has been bullied relentlessly and victim of abuses that range from slap-on-the-wrist to prison time crimes, I believe I've suspended my disbelief for long enough at Elly's anxiety. Like, apart from the bad actors she's met, most of the people have been nothing but welcoming and cool with her, especially with her whole spiel. I get her, I really do and I relate to her, but it's... stagnating, you know? Like in 10 chapters of happenings (albeit I suppose they were just two days), she seems to have only what, the same doubting rhetoricals she's had since the beginning? One would assume that someone would face the music after a while, as broken as they might be. At the very least, an indication that she understand that not everyone means her harm or something. I might've missed it, granted, but god damn, nothing penetrates her barrier.
As for Tomoyuki's take, I have agreed with it in the past and will echo his concerns first of all. It's tiresome to bring in so many characters with little to no apparent meaning and I'm sure that I don't want to keep a glossary of terms next to me for just one volume. It's probably got twenty characters in it and I'm not even past a fifth of the first volume. The main problem here comes, I believe, from an anti-Chekhov's gun way of writing. I get it that you like your characters and wanna give them stage time, but it's just ineffective storytelling. When the stage is too crowded, the protagonists can barely breathe. And with the style issue mentioned from the get-go, it's just an extremely difficult thing to sit through and enjoy without some concessions being made. And I don't wanna make concessions. :3
Alas, I think that's my stopping point for the day. I'm open to, ahem, questions. Not via DM, mind you. I'm hoping that I'll be able to mark some more chapters tomorrow, lest I find some fatal flaw or I just grow increasingly tired and it stops being worthwhile.
For what it's worth, there seems to have been an enormous amount of planning put into this novel and it shows with all the ramifications and character development (talking strictly about developing the characters as story elements, not the characters' development). At some point, though, it's a bit hard to take them out of the one-note, unfortunately evident with Elly. I guess she's more of the ironic side-heroine, whereas Blake is the eponymous character. Tsk, poor half-elf girl. If anything, I think it's the perspective that kind of shackles this. The limited third, whilst allowing for a much smoother immersion into the fantasy world has its caveats in creating a disjointed narration that changes 'styles' (it's the same, but it's the easiest way of saying it) four times already. If you're going to do head jumping of this caliber, does it really make sense anymore to have it be limited? Feels like a shot in the foot for gains that, in the end, don't seem to outweigh the losses.