Jul 05, 2022
Having only read the reboot version, I'd say that this is a pretty solid opener: you present a situation and have a good hook for the audience.
However, there is a bit of an issue for me personally, namely the first part and the dialogue with the police. While longer paragraphs aren't really a bad thing, for me they make it harder to keep track of whatever's going on, and the somewhat lack of proper breaks between certain dialogue lines doesn't really help either. But all of it I think can be fixed with a few breaks, so overall this is okay
