Jul 31, 2017
I really love the detailed play-by-play descriptions of the action. It really puts me in the moment and drags me along. I can't help but think you have some knowledge or familiarity with fighting, that's how good it is.
Rio being somewhat of an antihero is a really nice development, and as you mentioned in a comment, her use of submissions is a good unique touch, especially since you tie it into a story-based reason, such as Rio lacking physical strength. And wow ... beautiful, skilled, sadistic, and a [Renegade] ... scaarrrry.
The snapping of the Achilles tendon actually made me grimace, so a kudo-and-a-half for that! XD I also found the product placement of an iPhone to be a kicker, but it also seems a little strange, as I think it crossed a line between your pseudo-real world and this weird 3-D world we're in ... but that's just my opinion.
And I must ask ... "Got it memorized?" ... Kingdom Hearts reference, per chance???
