Sep 10, 2021
Never seen GGO, at first I was like "Hey, it's PUBG" but the dynamics between the new girl and the veteran, that reminds me much more of The Last of Us and the relationship Ellie and Joel formed throughout the game.
Wasn't here before the edit, my fellow non-native-English-speaker, but I would say the current edit is clear in terms differentiate dialogue from description. I am with you on the part where Joe's thoughts may be interlaced with those of the description of the environment since we are seeing the story unfold through his eyes and hence does not necessitate the use of italics. I would reserve for the more important thoughts so as to highlight them to the readers.
Would have love to know the names of our main characters on the first chapter (Maybe subtly included it in as kill messages like those of PUBG). That might help better familiarize us with them as characters of the story. However, at the same time, a part of me also interprets this lack of mention of names as another emphasis that BRO is, at the end of the day, just a multiplayer game, and in those games, names do not play that much of a role...
Overall, I'd love to read on how Ellie and Joe would do in the tournament (My apologies if their names got introduced later but "Ellie and Joe" is my personal headcannon now~)
