Jan 20, 2025
To:lolitroy
I can see what you mean. It's really hard to tell who's speaking in the final section. I will confirm it's definitely Irina. A part of me is kicking myself for not putting ["character's POV"] at the start of each POV shift, but another part of me felt doing that would degrade my score. Though I have seen stuff like that in officially published light novels. I will admit, there are times when I'm reading published light novels where I'm confused as to who's talking, whether it be dialogue or narration. Not that it justifies, the confusion here, but I just hope it isn't too detrimental to things.
One of the strategies I tried to employ to combat the confusion was referring to characters by name, since if they're being referred to, they can't be the one narrating. But clearly there are times when there needs to be a little more indication. Perhaps I could have instead used different symbols for the pov shifts, "..." for Hana, "<<<" for Irina, and "===" for Selena just to give some examples. Sadly, the time for edits is over, so I can't rectify this, but if I could, I would do my best to do so.
And yes, Irina is best girl. So much so that she ended up taking center stage as Hana's main travel companion. In the original drafts, Selena was meant to travel with the two as a trio, but I felt it worked better to have the focus primarily be on Hana and Irina, which is why I made them the main characters. The others will pop in and out though, so look forward to seeing them again if you like characters like Selena, Lyn, Delina, and Suzie.
