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Mario Nakano 64

It's a me. I'm an aspiring light novel writer hoping to one day see my works in anime form. I hope that my works at least brighten up your day and give you something to look forward to.

registered at: Jun 30, 2023

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Apr 22, 2024

Author's Commentary #3:

Time to talk about Chapter 3: The unbeatable escape room Part 3.
When I first wrote the chapter, I was surprised at how quickly Madoka and Yuni ended up escaping. Thus I decided to use the opportunity to introduce some other characters before the chapter ended.

First up is Serika Midoriya. She's 21 years old and has hated Yuni ever since they first got in a fight with each other at a restaurant back when they were both in school. Serika is also indebted to Reika, which also led to her hostility towards Yuni growing worse when Reika took her on as a partner instead of her.
緑谷芹佳 (Midoriya Serika) is how her name is spelled in kanji.
Her first name, 芹佳, means "celery" and "beautiful". This is why Madoka called her an "oversized twig of celery". 緑谷 means "green" and "valley", which is fitting since Serika has green hair.

Speaking of Serika's hair, she now has natural magenta highlights, whereas in the original, she did not.

Her birthday is August 31st. I actually chose this date at random, so there isn't much significance behind why that's her birthday.

I'll also go over Nakajima as well. Mutsumi Nakajima is 27-years old and desperately searching for a boyfriend. In the original draft, I made this trait about her more upfront, but decided to tone it back in rewrites.
中嶋六実 (Nakajima Mutsumi) is how her nae is spelled in kanji.
六実 means "six" and "sincerity" while 中嶋 means "inside" and "island".
(If I made any mistakes with the translation, feel free to correct me).

Her birthday is June 27th. Like Serika's, there isn't much meaning behind the date, though the date 6/27 could reference the fact that Mutsumi's name means "six" and that she's 27 years old.

As for Bianka, I'll talk about her more in a future commentary.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

Escape:Witch [Remake]

Chapter:3

Apr 22, 2024

To:Taylor J

Pretty much. It's also fitting considering hunger is a characteristic of the zanni character from Commedia dell'arte (Italian comedy).

When I originally wrote Zanni's character, I only named him after the zanni because of the mask he wore. After doing some retrospective research, however, I found he bore more similarities to the zanni than I thought. As such, his entire character can be considered a reference to the zanni of Commedia dell'arte rather than just the mask.

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:8

Apr 21, 2024

To:lolitroy

Sure, I'd really appreciate that.
Thanks to the judges feedback, I'm already aware that the story's way too dialogue heavy and rushes into things a bit, but if you notice any other critiques, feel free to point them out.

This story is probably going to be filled with more issues than Life Stream mainly because I was both rushing to get this in before the deadline, and because I was trying not to go over the maximum word count. As such, only the first 57 chapters of the remake ended up being submitted to the contest.

Once again, thanks for offering to critique my novel. I really appreciate it.

Spice of life [Remake]

Chapter:4

Apr 21, 2024

Author's Commentary #10:

Time to talk about Chapter 10: The girl who was frozen.
Believe it or not, this was also the 10th chapter in the original, however, instead of the flashback chapters taking place before it, a different arc which introduced some of the other main cast members took place.

As such, I truly felt that for the remake, Mimi's past with Rika needed to be shown off early. That way, this chapter would have a much greater impact than the original since now everyone would know of Rika's history with Mimi.

Now onto Mimi. She's now thawed out and ready to work. Not to mention Dastard turned out to be on of her old comrades. As for why she glomped Helga, Helga looks exactly like her old teammate and lover, Hylda. I'll explain a bit more about that relationship in a future commentary.

Finally, I know it's 10 chapters in, but I want to discuss some facts about Rika as well as Mimi. Rika's name in kanji is 小町俐佳 (Komachi Rika).
Her last name, 小町, means "small town" while 俐佳 means "sharp" and "beautiful". However, while her birthname was also Rika, it was spelled with the kanji, 凜嘩 and meant "coldness" and quarrel". Her original surname, ころせかい (Korosekai) is also a pun on the Japanese word, "korose" which means "to kill", however "sekai" means "the world", thus the pun was that her old surname meant "kill the world"

And as previously mentioned in the story, Rika's birthday is April 12th which she shares with Masaru, Ryokoma, and this remake since the first chapter of it was published on April 12th.

Now onto Mimi. Before she got her new ID, her name was Mimi Gravlax. Gravlax is a nordic salmon dish which is fitting since Mimi's codename was lax.
ミミ・グラヴラックス (Mimi Gravlax) was how her name would have been written. Now that she has a new ID her name is now Mimi Hanazawa.
花沢心美 (Hanazawa Mimi) is how her name is written in kanji.
花沢 means "flower" and "wetland" while 心美 means "heart" and "beauty".
(If I made any mistakes with the translations, feel free to correct me).

As previously mentioned, Mimi's birthday is January 20th which is National Cheese lovers day, which is fitting since Danablu cheese is her favorite food.

Now that the Mimi recruitment arc is over, it's on to the arc that originally took place right before this chapter in the original Spice of life. Even though the arc is largely the same, there is a major change so look forward to that.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

Spice of life [Remake]

Chapter:10

Apr 21, 2024

Author's Commentary #2:

Time to discus Chapter 2: The unbeatable escape room Part 2.
Madoka has now properly introduced herself, even though we already knew who she was. Originally, I wanted this series to focus more on having everyone escape through more logical means, but since I had no idea howto write that, I decided to just give Madoka the locktouch ability and make her OP in regards to escapology.

Originally I planned to have the two escape and go their separate ways before running into each other the next day and being kidnapped and thrown in the trunk of a car. However, I felt things would flow better if they got caught again which is why the chapter ended with them getting thrown in the trunk of a car.

I guess now is a good time to talk about our two main heroines, Yuni and Madoka.

First up, the Escape Witch herself, Madoka Ginkawa. In kanji, her name is spelled
銀川窓嘉 (Ginkawa Madoka). 銀川 means "silver river" while 窓嘉 means "window" and "excellent" as well as "opening in the wall".

Her birthday is March 24th which she actually shares with magician, Harry Houdini.

Now onto Yuni. 二川優似 (Futagawa Yuni) is how her name is spelled in kanji.
二川 means "two rivers" while 優似 means "skilled" and "resembling".
(If I made any mistakes with the translations, feel free to correct me).

Her birthday is February 1st. I'll elaborate a bit more on why I chose this date for her as the story progresses. Funnily enough, even though Yuni is older than Madoka, it's only by a month and a half.

One final thing I'll mention is the cup sizes. Yuni is indeed a D-cup while Madoka is a G-cup. Just thought I'd clarify that in case anyone wanted to know.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

Escape:Witch [Remake]

Chapter:2

Apr 20, 2024

Author's Commentary #1:

Welcome to the Author's Commentary for the Escape:Witch remake. Let's start things off by discussing Chapter 1: The unbeatable escape room part 1.
So first off, this will be a full remake of Escape Witch. The plot will largely remain the same, however there are some notable changes.

Now let's discuss the chapter. Originally, the first chapter of Escape Witch was not going to have Madoka and Yuni get kidnapped by a gang and trapped in an abandoned warehouse. They still would have met in an escape room, but would have gotten kidnapped after leaving it. I ended up abandoning the idea though in favor of the fake escape room since I felt Yuni and Madoka meeting at the escape room and getting kidnapped there would make a better story.

One final thing I'll discus is the title. The only reason I put a colon in the title was because I thought it made it look cooler. As such, I might refer to the title as either "Escape:Witch" or "Escape Witch" in these commentaries.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

Escape:Witch [Remake]

Chapter:1

Apr 20, 2024

Author's Commentary #9:

Time to talk about Chapter 9: A fateful day.
Like the other chapters in the Mimi flashback arc, this was originally written for an arc in Mystery ghost foresight. However, this chapter ended up also getting adapted into the original Spice of life where it was the 40th chapter. At that point in the original story, Mimi had already been thawed out, and I mainly included the chapter both to show Mimi's backstory and to properly introduce one of the main antagonists for the series, the one who slashed Mimi.

As you might have guessed, the woman who slashed Mimi is none other than Madam Ookuma, the one Rika hates more than anyone. Her real name is Ruchi Ookuma and she's currently the Opposition leader in the National Diet and is seeking to become the next prime minister. She is also the daughter of one of I.L.U.'s head honchos, Akuma Ookuma.

Believe it or not, Ookuma actually originated from my very first novel, Escape Witch, however, she had long since passed by the events of that story. Thus the original idea was to have her be the main antagonist of both Mystery ghost foresight and Spice of life in order to show how much of a villain she was since I couldn't do that in Escape Witch. Ookuma won't reappear in the story for a while though, however, there will be plenty of other menacing villains to fill the gap until then.

Now I want to touch on something I mentioned in a previous commentary. Before I mentioned the Mimi flashback arc was also going to serve as buildup for something else. That plot point is actually... The one who betrayed Mimi's team. I originally planned to have that reveal be in Mystery ghost foresight, but ended up writing the reveal into an arc of the Spice of life remake. As such, when that chapter ends up being posted in a few months, the traitor will be revealed. Feel free to speculate though if you want.

Another thing I'll mention is that the characters in the car were two of the main characters of Mystery ghost foresight. The silver-haired girl was Reiju Ginkawa, the main heroine of the series, while the middle school girl was Reika Yuzume, whom like Ookuma, originated in Escape Witch, but was dead before the story began. As such, Reika also ended up being added to Spice of life to show what her character was like before the events in Escape Witch.

For clarity's sake, Mystery Ghost foresight takes place in 2007, Spice of life in 2016, and Escape Witch in 2023.

The final thing I'll mention is that Mimi has been saved. Now all that's left is to recruit her, so look forward to that. As such, the next chapter will be the true finale of the Mimi recruitment arc.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

Spice of life [Remake]

Chapter:9

Apr 19, 2024

Well I definitely didn't predict Ekko giving a speech to try and free the class, or the reception to the speech being so good. Though I'm honestly the most surprised that the teacher remembers the time before the pills and was willing to toss the pills away. Though the MC's sister is still a mystery.

The Pill That Killed Romance

Chapter:8

Apr 19, 2024

Author's Commentary #56:

Time to talk about Chapter 56: A meadow of chess and a little night music.
The long awaited Peter vs Mimoko rematch is here. And what better way to highlight it's grandeur than with Mozart's Eine kleine nachtmusik. Fun fact: Eine kleine nachtmusik translates to "a little night music" which is why it's in the title. I would highly recommend listening to the song in the background while reading the chapter as the music truly makes the chapter. Heck, I was even listening to the song as I wrote the game.

Speaking of which, the game started off much like the previous game between these two mainly because I wanted them to play through the original game with no time constraints. However, I then noticed the blunder Peter made by moving his pawn to d5 instead of moving his knight away. However, that in turn opened up a new avenue to approach the game, and I couldn't have been happier.

This chapter is easily one one of my top 5 chapters I'd want to see animated the most. And of the released chapters and even the ones that have yet to release, this might even be my favorite chapter. Even though there weren't too many crazy plays, the atmosphere (mainly the music) truly made this chapter amazing.

Fun story: When I was young, I had a game in the Chessmaster series (I forget which version it was) and one of the music tracks you could have play was, you guessed it, Eine kleine nachtmusik. As such, I've always associated the piece with chess, which is easily why I wanted it to be featured in a chapter of this novel.

As for Peter, he doesn't need a DESPER, he can imagine a meadow of chess just fine without it. And not only did he and Mimoko have fun during the game, I also had fun writing it. I guess until the next Peter vs Mimoko ft Eine kleine nachtmusik match, this chapter will be my favorite.

As for why Mimoko got flustered at the end, Peter said his thoughts out loud. This truly is the happiest he's been playing chess. If you know the history of Paul Morphy, the person Peter's based off of, you'll know that he ended up walking away from chess because he got too bored of it. Peter was in a similar boat which is why he frequently implements odds and seeks out strong rivals. But after playing Mimoko, Peter realized that she had the potential to truly rival him and as such, he longed for a proper rematch and when he got it, he had the time of his life.

Well that was a long commentary, but I guess it goes to show how passionate I am about this chapter. I'm glad it's finally published so others can read it.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:56

Apr 19, 2024

Hmm, seems like Rayan might end up causing some problems between Kayla and Miko. It's also cool to know that he's the one that gave Lilith the marks on her face. I'm curious to see how he'll affect the story going forward.

Your Healer

Chapter:27

Apr 19, 2024

Author's Commentary #8:

Time to talk about Chapter 8: The spies from Danablu.
This is a new chapter for Spice of life that was originally adapted from a chapter of Mystery ghost foresight like Chapter 7. However, this one ended up being greatly edited from it's original counterpart due to being added to Spice of life for the contest.

I guess now is a good time to talk about Mimi's fellow spies. In addition to Mimi, there was Mille, Marzi, Vivi, Sherry, Eluf, Katrina, and Hylda. As for the countries, Denmark was Danablu, the Soviet Union was Crimgulag, and Japan was Kabuto.

As for how Mimi ended up frozen in the first place, one of her team members betrayed everyone and as a result some of the team members like Hylda and Mille got captured. Mimi was attempting to rescue Hylda, but an assailant shoved her into a cryogenic freezing pod. When she came to, she was in Japan with Rika.

Originally, this chapter was going to serve as buildup for something larger, but I ended up casting that idea aside in favor of using Mille to explain the merger of the Danablu world and the regular one when I was originally writing this for the contest. Once I submitted the remake to the contest, however, I began writing a season 2 of the remake and that was where I was able to finally pull off the original plot point I started with this chapter. I'll explain a bit more about what I'm talking about in the next commentary, since the next chapter is the climatic finale of the Rika and Mimi flashback arc.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

Spice of life [Remake]

Chapter:8

Apr 18, 2024

Author's Commentary #55:

Time to discuss Chapter 55: A hair stakes match.
Like the previous chapter, this was originally set to be two different chapters, but I felt they worked better combined as one. "Not so bald" was going to be the title of the second half of this chapter before I merged it.

Now let's talk about the puns. Obviously, this chapter title and the draft title are puns on the phrases "A high stakes match" and "Not so bad". I was actually debating which one to use for the chapter, but ultimately went with "A hair stakes match" as I felt the other title could be spoilery.

Now let's go over the game. This one was short and sweet, but the one thing I really wanted it to highlight was Iori's inner thought process. Iori is obviously smarter than she lets on, but how much smarter is still a mystery. Okisato can't quite get a read on her, but he definitely suspects she's hiding something dark.

Finally, Iori's now bald... Just kidding. Utami ended up deciding to go with the bald cap, mainly because she felt not shaving Iori would deprive her of what she wanted; content. Of course, Iori still managed to get content out of the ordeal. Though thanks to the gagball, she's now unable to properly challenge Haruki.

Even if Haruki activated his DESPER against her, the DESPER would deem that Iori's at a disadvantage due to the gagball, and thus unable to properly voice her terms for the wager, thus it would declare the encounter a draw and deactivate.

On a completely unrelated note, I'm now caught up with the commentaries for this series. This means that new commentaries will be released daily to coincide with the daily chapter releases.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:55

Apr 18, 2024

Author's Commentary #54:

Time to discuss Chapter 54: Intellect and madness.
Originally, these were two separate chapters, but after seeing how short the first half was, I decided to combine it with the next chapter. The original names for these chapters were "The mad queen and the girl blessed by chess" and "Chaos factor".

The point of the chapter was to put the spotlight on Utami. First, Mimoko purified her of her mad persona, but unintentionally made her worse off than she was before. To make matters worse, the piece of shit is aware and has now declared his intent to rope Utami into his diabolical plan.

However, an unlikely savior has appeared. Everyone's favorite streamer, Iori-chan! Yes, Iori's going to become relevant in the story again, and what better way to make her reemergence than to hit Utami with a crazy bet that loser shaves their head and eyebrows and gets a head tattoo... Ok, maybe she isn't quite the unlikely savior, but Peter certainly is.

Peter is actually aware of the piece of shit's plan, however, he refuses to just give away the answer, mainly because he is both hoping for Okisato to guess things on his own, and because telling Okisato could risk the piece of shit changing plans and coming back at a later date with an even nastier one. He will however, offer Okisato clarity should he guess something right about the piece of shit's plan.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:54

Apr 18, 2024

Author's Commentary #52:

It's time to talk about Chapter 52: The mad queen unleashed.
Just as promised, here's another Důras gambit game. Bibi was completely humiliated and Utami has descended into madness. Though it seems like Mimoko's going to put a halt to that. I guess as a consolation prize for her loss, we'll discuss Bibi.

Originally, Bibi was meant to be the captain of a rival chess team which would serve as the antagonists for a planned arc. However, I ended up abandoning the idea when I finalized the story for Season 2. However, I still wanted to include her in the story so I had her be fodder for Utami.

Her name in kanji is 枇杷木美琵 (Biwaki Bibi). Her first name, 美琵, means "beauty" and "biwa", while her last name, 枇杷木, means "loquat", "pole", and "tree".
(If I made any mistakes with the translations, feel free to correct me).

Her birthday is July 10th which is a reference to the year 710, which was the start of the Nara period. The reason I chose this is because the biwa was said to have first reached Japan during the Nara period (710 to 794).

Her favorite piece is the queen, since Bibi views herself as a regal woman.

While Bibi had a rough time and is going to drop in her rating a bit, this won't be the last we see of her in the story. And who knows, maybe I'll resurrect the rival chess team idea I had when she comes back into the story again.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:52

Apr 18, 2024

Author's Commentary #21:

It's time to discuss Chapter 21: Chess experiment.
his chapter essentially served as a way to help spread word of the chess club throughout the school, and establish Maida as the supervising teacher for it. As such, I decided that it would be fitting for her to have her class do an experiment related to chess. The experiment is essentially seeing what the most common moves are amongst the class. Though when class reconvenes, the students will play each other from the e4 Nf6 position so look forward to that.

Finally, the big secret regarding Hagemi is out; she's the top female chess player in the world. I'll talk more about her background later, so for now, we'll just go over some basic trivia about her.

Her name is written as 承先励美 (Shousen Hagemi) in kanji, with her first name, 励美, translates to "Inspire" and "beautiful". Now remember how I said way back in Author's Commentary #3 that 承先 can mean "first"? That's why I chose it to be Yuusuke and Hagemi's surname as Hagemi is currently the number 1 female chess player in the world.
(If I made any mistakes with the translations, feel free to correct me).

Her birthday is March 31st which she shares with Koneru Humpy, an Indian grandmaster and one of the top female chess players of all time.

Her favorite piece is the rook. Initially, she thought rooks were lousy, but quickly found how valuable they are in the endgame, which led to them becoming her favorite piece.

That's all for this commentary. I hope you enjoyed it.

En Passant Grandmaster

Chapter:21

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