Mario Nakano 64 / Comments

Mario Nakano 64

It's a me. I'm an aspiring light novel writer hoping to one day see my works in anime form. I hope that my works at least brighten up your day and give you something to look forward to.

registered at: Jun 30, 2023

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aaa

Nov 22, 2025

[Game log #2]

Here's the game from Chapters 2 and 3 between Yuusuke and Utami. Note that for informal matches, I won't list the character's ratings.

[Event "N/A"]
[Site "Kawaguchi, Saitama"]
[Date "2024.07.31"]
[Round "N/A"]
[White "Yuusuke Shousen"]
[Black "Utami Enoki"]
[Result "1-0"]

1. Nc3 e5 2. Nf3 Qf6 3. Nd5 Qd6 4. e4 c6 5. Nc3 Qf6 6. Bc4 Bc5 7. O-O d5 8. exd5 cxd5 9. Nxd5 Qd6 10. Nxe5 Ne7 11. Nc7+ Qxc7 12. Bxf7+ Kf8 13. Qf3 Qxe5 14. Be6+ Nf5 15. Bxc8 Nc6 16. Bxb7 Re8 17. Bxc6 Re7 18. b4 Bd4 19. c3 Bb6 20. d4 Qf6 21. Bf4 Nh4 22. Qd5 Qxf4 23. Rfe1 Rxe1+ 24. Rxe1 Qb8 25. Qd7 Nf5 26. Qxf5+ Kg8 27. Bd5# 1-0

En Passant Grandmaster Volume 1

Chapter:3

Nov 22, 2025

[Game log #1]

Decided to post all the games in the comments so that readers can copy/paste them into a chess analysis engine with ease to better view the games. Here's Game #1 from Chapter 1 between Okisato and Inojin. This revised edition of the game log now includes more information such as the location the match takes place at along with the date it takes place on, as well as tournament and round information when applicable. I hope you enjoy it.

[Event "N/A"]
[Site "Kawaguchi, Saitama"]
[Date "2024.07.30"]
[Round "N/A"]
[White "Okisato Tanabe (2434)"]
[Black "Inojin Inosuke (1321)"]
[Result "1-0"]

1. e4 e5 2. d4 Bb4+ 3. Nc3 Ne7 4. Nf3 Nbc6 5. Bd3 exd4 6. e5 O-O 7. Bxh7+ Kxh7 8. Ng5+ Kg6 9. h4 dxc3 10. Qg4 cxb2+ 11. Ke2 bxa1=Q 12. h5+ Kh6 13. Ne6+ g5 14. hxg6# 1-0

En Passant Grandmaster Volume 1

Chapter:1

Nov 22, 2025

While I love me some good ole GL, this one left me a little mixed. Though I get you want to portray Mila as wanting to help Amy, her method of slipping the phone in the bag honestly raises a red flag for me. It reeks more of malintent than not, which while I feel isn't the intent, still rubs me in that way. Amy has every right to be on guard as with the drop of a pin, Mila could trap her thanks to phone, as Amy is vulnerable to the point where I feel Mila could easily take advantage of her if she so chose to. I get that might not be the intent, but with under 2,000 words worth of content, it's hard to judge what kind of person Mila truly is.

In terms of suggestions, slipping a note or business card in Amy's bag might have been a less red-flagy way of trying to initiate contact with Amy, or even exchanging phone numbers when the two first encountered each other. But of course, you are the author and have every right to write your story the way you see fit.

Overall, I think the main problem is more so the length as it doesn't leave lots of room for character development. That being said, I don't mind short and sweet reads.

Incoming Call

Chapter:2

Nov 22, 2025

Hmm, not sure I'm a fan of this method of intentionally slipping your phone in someone else's bag in order to force a conversation with them. I feel just the act of intentionally slipping anything intentionally into someone else's bag is a huge red flag. That's the kind of stuff spies do.

Incoming Call

Chapter:1

Nov 22, 2025

To:Ashley

Yes, it is very good.